It feels good when I start hovering through my drafts to pick up some random writings aka thoughts I have stored or left midway. It gives me a glance at different situations or thoughts that go through my mind at different times. So I am going to share some of them randomly from that storehouse.
Sometimes I feel nostalgic when I go through my old photos. How beautiful and precious those moments were! I search for a way back to those moments skipping the midway happenings that created distance. Maybe that drawer from Doraemon could help me out to do time travel, where can I find Doraemon? I have been searching from my cartoon days. At that time was so easy to plan with Doraemon. I was like, "If I get Doraemon, I won't be doing the dumb things nobita did, I would use this gadget in this way, will be doing this with that one, bla bla bla." Shit, I didn't get Doraemon even after so many years.
This year I never felt that I needed to be loved by someone in particular who will be just mine. I meant relationship, I was happy around with everything going normally with everyone. I was happy with the vast amount of friends with no leveling of the close or distant friend, I put preferences as much as they have given, nor did I expect something bigger from someone nor did I give to someone. That's how it went and I was happy with that too, it feels amazing. No massive chest pain there, hehehe.
Is it mandatory to have someone all the time? This is like a feeling that shouldn't be made too cheap to spend on anyone you bump into. We must reserve that special feeling for the special people and I am sure I haven't bumped into anyone this year who could be my special person. Let's wait for 2022 if I find any.
Sometimes I feel like testing to disappear all of a sudden without any hint or any clue to my whereabouts. Isn't it amazing? Deactivating the social media accounts, turning off the sim cards, and leaving for somewhere far from here, where no one knows you. Maybe a couple of days is enough to have that feel. Obviously, you can't do that with your family but at least with others. Because in the end, you would have very few people left to be concerned about you apart from your family.
Well, I will be trying this soon enough to explore myself in my way, getting away from my comfort zones, maybe traveling somewhere alone, maybe trying to meet some new people. So many things go through my mind, I don't even know whether I would be able to fulfill them or not. But one thing I know is that planning these costs me nothing and I would be ready to execute them if I get any chance to grab them.
The last part is to seek something from you guys.
For some reason, I am feeling like the issue of my sleeping cycle is turning into a disaster for the last few weeks. Normally, I sleep late at night, but for the last few weeks, the schedule has become too late. I am feeling like I'm drowning deep into the cycle. I find comfort in these hours but deep down I am sinking into it, more than I have planned or my body could adjust. One friend of mine noticed this and warned me about this habit of mine and warned me too. Any tips or advice to come back from this cycle? How can I adjust my sleeping hours back to normal?
