For the first time in 3 years, I am starting to prepare for my holiday back in the Philippines. I am so looking forward to the things that I would be doing there, to all the people I wanted to connect and to visit the places I used to frequent as a child.
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Unfortunately, I am also burdened with the pasalubung culture. If you are not a Filipino, you are probably not familiar with the pasalubung system. When someone is returning back home to the Philippines, it is expected for the person to bring in some small gifts- usually chocolates, clothes, bags- whatever is acceptable as presents.
Despite the fact that some people received a pasalubung from me, they are still expecting more from me. Their unhappiness came in the form of comments that this and that person is more generous and therefore will be more blessed. Some are more blatant by telling me that I am greedy, I am a pinched penny type of person.
I used to be upset when I initially learned about this. But, this had also invited me into this: no matter what I would have given them, they will never be satisfied. I am feeding their emotional need to be ahead everyone by getting as much as they can. As I have mentioned in my previous post, I cannot please everyone.
I do not see anything wrong with gift giving or the pasalubung system. People are innately generous and kind to each other where I was raised. Probably, I should change my mindset when giving out pasalubungs. I will not be expecting people to be grateful nor will I be hurt if they start making unhappy comments toward what they received from me.
Ultimately, its just about me observing our culture, sharing my blessings and joy in coming back home. It had never been about me gaining popularity, love, loyalty or faith to those I have bestowed upon pasalubongs.
