A problem that arises within us

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I often look at people, and without wanting to offend anyone, including myself, but I look at people who don't like themselves, and that is surely the most difficult position they/we can be in.

It's difficult because they are always fighting with themselves.

It's hard enough to face the outside world.

And no one will like you more than you like yourself. That's a fact. It may happen initially, but then, without self-love, the other side, and the outside world, will read that gap.

I myself have been in relationships where I am sure that the person I was with liked me. And I liked them. But I didn't have a well-founded self-love. I don't know if it was due to insecurities related to my physical appearance, or other deeper issues of accepting my appearance, and how I saw that image I had affected the way I related to the outside world and to myself. What happened, and what I can identify today, is that with my lack of compassion for myself, I became someone who could not be loved by others, at least not to the extent that I loved them. But this may be a topic for me to explain in another future post.

Therefore, if you are struggling with yourself, the outside world will become an immeasurable challenge.

It is difficult to say why people end up having or developing low self-esteem or poor self-love. There may indeed be a genetic justification or cause, which may even predispose them, or it may just be circumstantial, or even a matter of upbringing. What we see around us during our development ends up shaping us accordingly.

I often think it's because there wasn't completely unconditional love during development.

And that will settle at a deeper level. A core level.

But issues of self-love or self-esteem can be more limiting.

An interesting thought is that, you know, to a certain extent, self-love is a reputation. A reputation you have of yourself.

You are constantly watching your actions, reading your thoughts, you know what you are doing, and the purposes that underlie your ideas or your thoughts. And each of us has our own moral code.

We all have a different moral code.

But if you don't live according to your own moral code, the same one you have for others, and the way you “create values” and attribute value to others, it will surely damage, harm, and gradually destroy your self-esteem.

So perhaps one way to increase and strengthen self-esteem is to live according to our own moral code. And to do so very strictly.