Ever heard someone say, “How good it would’ve been if only I had chosen Law instead of Business as a profession”…? Or maybe, “How good it would’ve been if only I had not crossed that road, I could have saved myself from the accident”…? We all have heard some of these phrases before. Even some of us are guilty of them ourselves. That’s counter-factual thinking, and it’s immensely fallacious.
Never think counter-factually. How good it would’ve been if only this had happened instead of that – yeah sure, It would’ve been pretty nice ! But that is not how life works.
Stephen Covey talks about life in his book 7 Habits of Highly Effective People saying,
Your life doesn’t just “happen.” Whether you know it or not, it is carefully designed by you. The choices, after all, are yours. You choose happiness. You choose sadness. You choose decisiveness. You choose ambivalence. You choose success. You choose failure. You choose courage. You choose fear. Just remember that every moment, every situation, provides a new choice. And in doing so, it gives you a perfect opportunity to do things differently to produce more positive results.
Life is, indeed, a series of choices that we make and each choice or decision in a particular situation determines the result we will get from that situation. In this way, each situation and each event that has ever happened or will ever happen is entirely under our own control through our choices and decisions, directly or indirectly.
So in other words, life works as a ‘chain of events’ and the occurrence of one event leads to the occurrence of another, where each event serves as an independent link in the chain of life. Remove one link and all the links that come after are also removed. Remove one event and all the events that come after are also removed, or altered to a great extent – to say the least.
Life doesn’t allow us to cherry-pick our favorite events and simply delete the unpleasant ones. The reason is that not one of these events but a combination of all of them makes us who we are. And at the end, life has wonderful ways of balancing itself, balancing the pleasant and the unpleasant, in ways we could not even fathom.
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