An Unwanted Win

Sometimes a person, just needs a win. It doesn't necessarily have to be something big, but something - some recognition, a surprise free coffee, a smile from a cute stranger... something.

But, while there might be a need for the win, that win can't come cheaply either, it can't come for nothing, it has to be attached to something, there has to be an action that catalyzes it, some skin in the game - otherwise, it isn't a win, it is pity.

I pity the fool.

Don't you find it interesting that people want sympathy, but they don't want pity?

Yes, they are synonymous. At least pity has compassion in the definition, which is far, far healthier than empathy, where empathy makes the wild assumption that a person can feel what another person is going through. Compassion only needs to make the assumption that there is suffering in another person and that is enough to activate a support response. Empathetic people will only help those who they can connect with emotionally.

These days though, people hold a victim mentality and are victimized by absolutely everything. They put up a strong front and talk about their resilience and ability to overcome, but at the next criticism, cry foul of "attack" and use every excuse as to why this case is different.

The exception proves the rule?

Everyone thinks they are the exception. Don't they? The outlier, the special case, the one things happen to, that don't happen to anyone else. Especially negative things. Everyone thinks that their hard life is unique, and it is at a technical level as each of our experiences on earth are unique. But wake up... everyone has shit to face in their life.

Everyone.

I think that this is one of the reasons I write as I do, where I put the effort into what I produce and, I am relatively open with my personal challenges. I don't do it to complain, I don't do it for sympathy or support - I do it because it helps. It helps me selfishly, because it allows me to process my experience. But, I think it can also help others as much of what I write and talk about here, might help other people face some of their own issues.

Fuck. I have so many issues.

And really, it does feel at times as I am being targeted, that if there was a God, it is a cunt with a vendetta against me, because I don't believe in its rotten ass. Sound harsh? A God is almighty and powerful right? Why the hell would God be vengeful?

That is a human trait.

A God would be all loving, because it would have zero fear of anything, including what a human thought of it.

Think on it a bit when you imagine your idea of heaven.

Your idea. Not reality. You can't know reality, it is all perspective of human filters applied. No one can even see this present moment clearly and unfiltered, yet still feel confident enough to make truth claims about an unproven concept.

Believe what you want to believe.

After all, your life is your own, isn't it? If you think life should be fair, you are in for a world of pain. Because it is not fair, at least at the human level. at the energy level it is fair - energy can't be created or destroyed, just transferred, and we are all energy, but that doesn't mean our worlds are the same, that the energy of human experience is spread evenly across the population.

Just because you need a win, doesn't mean you are going to get it.

Look at the hundreds of millions of people who have died in agony at the hands of violent leaders throughout history and think - they probably felt they needed a win at some point too. And most likely, the challenges they faced were far more extreme and difficult than what we mostly face today. Did they see themselves as victims, or was misfortune and misery, just a part of the spectrum of life experience?

You were teased at school?

Diddums.

It wasn't that long ago that most people didn't have the option to go to school at all. Instead, they were working alongside adults doing quite horrible jobs, getting yelled at and beaten, for very little reward. No Playstation to go home to after work either.

Were they victims?

They are our ancestors, they are scattered across our family trees. People who risked their lives and fought and died for their beliefs. And still, nothing much in the world has changed, people are still fighting and dying, whether the beliefs are valid or not.

They say, "stand up for your beliefs." Of course, the caveat here is, as long as it is what is socially acceptable for the time. And these days, if what people stood for in the past isn't socially acceptable today, they go back into history and wipe achievements away, tear the statues down - not realizing that they themselves have done nothing and will likely do nothing worthy of remembrance at all.

Impactless.

All that energy transferred into a being with thought and the capabilities to create a better world, with most amounting to nothing at all, doing nothing, changing nothing, affecting nothing. The energy just seeping out into space, hopefully to transfer into something more worthy, something of value. Perhaps somebody who can help people get some of those true wins - help them earn the reward, making it valuable.

Yet, in a world of instant gratification and lacking commitment, it is unlikely that anything much is going to be achieved at a large scale, because to do so, takes time, skills and cooperation - and no one is willing to invest, no one is willing to put skin in the game and hold it to the fire, even if it is getting burned to the bone.

The easy win. The fast win. The painless win.

This is what people want today and perhaps always have in history too, but now - people can fake it. They can get the sense of winning through manipulating their reality, even though nothing actually changes. Motivators and influencers who are "inspiring their audience" through lies about their lives, their successes, their skills, their looks.

An easy win. There is always a cost.

But the energy transfer doesn't care about individuals, so there can be massive asymmetries of input and output, with some doing a lot for very little, and others doing very little for a lot.