In life, how you relate with people (your interpersonal relationship) will determine a lot of things about you and will also influence how they will relate back to you. Trust me, building a good relationship goes way beyond just meeting with people and discussing with them, there is a need for you to consciously build a connection with them. One thing to have in mind is that, no matter your abilities, capacity, talents, background, etc, you will still need people in your life, otherwise you will live a very lonely life. There are points, however, to note that will help you to move your interpersonal relationship higher to the next level. We shall take a look at how to build a good interpersonal relationship with people.
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The first point to note is that the journey to building interpersonal relationship starts with building an intra-personal relationship. That is, you must have a connection with yourself first before you can connect with others. Build yourself first before you can build with with others. In order to do this, you must first accept your imperfections so that they will not weaken you in the long run. By accepting your flaws is not giving excuses for them but owning and taking responsibility for your flaws, then understanding that it is a "human-thing" to be imperfect. After accepting this, then work to become better. Trust me, when you get better with yourself, people will easily be magnetized towards you because you will become sought after.
After working on yourself and on your flaws to become better, then you need to open up yourself to welcome friendship. To do this, you have to learn to value people; their personality, their opinions and their nature. Trust me, people are naturally drawn to being friends with the people that value them. So if you want to get people around you, try to make them feel comfortable around you. Do not be too quick to judge them based on what their actions may show, but take a moment to listen to what their intentions are saying. Sometimes, even the purest of intentions may come off with a not-so-good action, so learn to focus less on what their actions are saying and more on what their intentions imply.
Still on valuing people, also try to compliment them for something you perceive as good about them. This will make them to feel comfortable around you. Of course, everyone has a good side of them that you can compliment if you want to. So instead of focusing on what is not too good about them, focus on their strong points. But note; this applies if the person is relatively good. If not, then you do not have any business seeking their friendship or seeking for their relationship. That being said, you need to seek friendship and relationship from people that will be of a positive addition to your life, not those that will drag you back with their crooked personality.
Another way to build your interpersonal relationship with people is to learn to build respect for people. The measure of respect you give to people will determine how they will also respect you. You cannot disrespect someone and hope for them to hang around you. But if you give out respect, then you will be sure to get their friendship and also earn their respect. When you want to talk to people, no matter the status the are, even if they are your subordinate, always be respectful for the sake of humanity. Trust me, people pay attention to how you treat others and they will use that to rate you. If you are selectively respectful to the people higher than you but not to others, then you are not respectful at all.
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To build interpersonal relationship, you have to also learn how to bring in and use humour. It is not everytime that you will be over-serious, try to also have your moments of lighter mood, so that you will not end up looking like a "dictator." There is nothing wrong in making jokes and lighten the environment. It also makes you to appear better, look nicer, friendlier, and makes you look more creative. Of course, it takes a high level of mental intelligence to be able to crack some jokes. In addition, you create a good first impression when you employ the proper use of humour.
The final point to note that will enhance your interpersonal relationship is to be attentive to body languages and other non-verbal methods of communication. When communicating, do not only be focused on the use of words, also master the act of communicating beyond the use of words. Smile often, maintain eye contact but do not overdo it so that you will not look like you have some hidden bad motive. Always remember to be "you," and not trying to disguise as who you are not.
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