"What do you want?"
"I want to be big like you, taller than everyone."
"Why so?"
"Then I will be able to travel like you, no one will restrict me to anything, I won't be needed to study throughout the whole day, no school, no tuition."
He just laughed and told me, "You will be bigger than me."
Yeap, now I am bigger than him, by height. After reaching my goal I realized what I was chasing.
Sometimes, I used to go to the field with my elder brother, and cry for taking me in their game too. They would take me in team but as a dudhbhat, this means I am there but my activities won't be counted, I didn't mind as I didn't know the meaning of calling me by that name. When I came to realize I wanted to be bigger than them, taller than them, at that phase only physical growth was the medium of judging someone a kid or an adult.
Now that I am grown up, way more than I had expected, I lost all the urge and opportunities to play what I had meant that day.
So what's wrong here? Am I ranting? Not exactly. It's just the realization that everything looks so appealing at first, the real taste can be felt only after having a bite. Now that I am biting, it's giving me different experiences that I hadn't expected.
If I were to advise a kid, I would say, "Like airplanes that fly in the sky, don't bother the vehicles on the ground. In life, problems fly above the height of 5 feet usually, don't grow up, you would be safe otherwise be prepared for possible crashes." I am having crashes, not regularly but occasionally and those are pretty enough to create havoc that lasts long. Mostly, you won't see them coming, sometimes you may escape by an inch, or sometimes you just crash face to face. Got escaped a few days ago, but today I got a scratch. I just pray and hope that it doesn't turn out to be something else. Who knows, what's connected to the chain of problems? No one, we just wait and see what's delivered to us, that's what I am doing, waiting for tomorrow, to see the damage and cost to repair.
It's midnight, raining heavily, due to the lighting, my darkroom is flashing every few minutes. Anything about midnight rain and thunder? Ummmm, nothing as of now.