Why did the sea-monster eat 5 ships filled with potatoes? Because no one can eat just one potato ship.
Why did the little refrigerator salute the big refrigerator? Because he was General Electric.
Where do you weigh a pie? Somewhere over the rainbow.
Do you have any motivational books? Yeah, they're in the back. (long pause) Do you have any that are closer?
Sometimes I squat... ...and pull my legs up to my chest and lean forward. Why? That's how I roll.