Yesterday didn't go as planned.
Woke up early. Didn't sleep well to begin with. But when I sat up in bed, I could tell it was gonna be one of those days. My head felt like it was in a fish bowl and I felt wonky. That's usually the sign I'm about to have a bad day.
I wobbled into the kitchen after splashing some water on my face. Started making some instant coffee. Next thing I knew I was on my knees looking at the kitchen floor.
Luckily I stayed conscious enough to buckle down to my knees before falling like a log. I stayed on the floor until I got my wits. Once that happened I struggled to my feet. Made my way into the living room and took a seat in the recliner. There I stayed most of the rest of the day. Each time I got up, the wonkiness would hit me. The fish bowl effect never going away.
These are my days sometimes.
What sucks about it is I was supposed to have a friend and his wife come visit. They were going to drive about an hour and a half to have lunch with us. We had to cancel. Sucks because I haven't seen him in a while. He's an old boss of mine that I respect a great deal.
We stay in touch via text. We plan to reschedule and try again. That's all you can do.
Good Leaders Stay With You
He was one of those leaders that made it great to work for. He would make sure you understood the mission and his intent. Then he would leave you alone to execute as you saw fit to deliver. Within the law and lateral limits, of course. But otherwise, stay out of my way.
I love working that way. Give me the mission and intent, left and right lateral limits, then let me run.
I think he loved that bulldoggedness about me too.
I think I still have that bulldoggedness somewhere. Not sure where it went though. Wish I could find it again.
Motivation is a Lie
Read a post recently about how we shouldn't rely on motivation to make ourselves do shit. I believe that. Sometimes you just have to love the suck. It's never all unicorns and flowers. Motivation is not always a given.
Like the article said, we have to build habits. When you have good habits, you don't need motivation. The habit carries you through the days when you don't feel like doing a damn thing.
I just need to build good habits again that support that bulldogged attitude toward work.
Habits require commitment though. They require consistency. Not sure I've been putting much of either of those into anything these days.
I have been taking baby steps and making minor changes. Moving around more. Changing diet. Quitting tobacco. Taking up tai chi and other things.
Maybe what I need is one large drastic change to shake it up around here.
I'll have to do some thinking on that.
More to follow.
Thanks for reading,
Joe
Notes:
-All content is mine unless otherwise annotated.
-Images are my own unless otherwise noted.
-Photos edited using Linux photo editor and drawing and/or iPhone SE.
-Page Dividers from The Terminal Discord.
