Yesterday I wrote about how I wasted 45 minutes searching for my earplugs and eventually missing the sunset: http://alin.co/5w1t
Today I want to reflect upon how that happened and what I can learn from it.
After realizing how silly this was, I reached for the spare pair in the drawer and eventually left the house. At this point, it was no longer about catching the sunset, but taking a walk to forget about the whole thing.
I'm outside, my mind is still busy -but I'm no longer interested where could they be, I'm trying to understand how did this happen?
Well, I had a goal and I thought I am clear about what I wanted -to go watch the sunset. It was the goal until I realized I don't find my earplugs, and that's when the goal shifted. After I got intrigued, it became -this is weird, where could they be?
I literally inserted a new fake goal that was now preventing me to achieve my real goal. And the way I did it, was by giving it more importance than it actually had -constructing a false condition: I cannot go without my earplugs - and although I had a spare pair in my drawer.
I wanted this pair, not the other one. Which again is very silly because I could go see the sunset using the spare one.
The more I thought about it I realized there were other times when something similar happened maybe with a favorite T-shirt or some other bullshit excuse that was preventing me to achieve my real goal.
This was not the first time, it was just another display, another manifestation of the same mistake I did many times throughout my life.
Getting myself stuck into solving the wrong problem at the wrong time, just because it felt important.
After 5 minutes of searching I could have easily taken the spare ones and go see the sunset, but why didn't I do it?
It's because without my awareness my actions became about something else; there was never an explicit restating on my goal, it just shifted outside my awareness. It just became the new thing I'm pursuing, without me making an explicit decision about it.
I finish my walk, I get back home; as I sit in the bed to start writing, next to me wrapped into a T-shirt I see them. It's almost as if they try to teach me a lesson. Now I feel even more silly.
Assuming my new level of embarrassment, I start thinking -how could I have prevented this? I need a set of rules...
First rule. Always your goal and don't get fixated on details. If something doesn't work, consider alternatives.
Second Rule. Have self-awareness/notice the switch. If your actions suddenly become about something else notice that. Refuse to make the switch, or if you already did -quickly adjust and resume your journey.
The fake goal(find my earplugs) was never explicitly verbalized, I never made a conscious decision, and so it infiltrated my actions; but by keeping my goal locked and clear while staying aware of my actions, I could have caught the sunset.
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