Did being a parent always suck?
Perhaps. But I feel there has been a massive escalation in the things that a parent has to worry about these days that weren't even a thing when I was a kid - like all the digital issues with bullying, stalking, hacking private information. Then there is the massive ramp up of synthetic drugs. And on top of all this, just the issues in the world, with violence, war, conflict, environment, and all of the social media pitfalls that are made for children to fall into.
Kids have it pretty hard.
Not necessarily physically hard.
But, there are just so many options and traps that lay in front of them, that they must be struggling to make any choices, let alone making good choices. It isn't just about whether they do their homework or not, it is about whether they make it into adulthood with their mind and body intact, with the skills necessary to do something that brings them enough income, and hopefully doesn't undermine their integrity.
I look at some of the kids out there and they don't fill me with faith.
But I think that being a kid sucks for another reason these days, because a lot of the "grownups" are only that by age, not by mindset. I feel that when I was young, people much younger than me were far more mature than I might be today. Nowadays, adults want to spend just as much time (if not more) playing games and being entertained than the kids, so there really aren't that many mature people to look up to.
Respect your elders.
This is something I have always questioned, because just if someone is older, doesn't mean they deserve respect. I think it is even more questionable now, because age doesn't come with that much experience either, so the maturity gap between young and old seems to be closing. The young are growing up faster with access to a vast pool of digital experience at the least, and then as they hit some point, they slow down maturing, instead looking to hold onto the good times of their youth forever.
I think that is one of the key reasons many don't have kids.
They aren't mature enough.
There will likely be pushback on that statement, but having kids used to be part of a cultural progression that it isn't now. Instead, there are many pathways to live, and a large number of people are taking the one where they don't have to grow up, and instead they can keep on partying like they are at a college kegger. If looking to constantly satisfy one's own desires, there isn't the maturity to consider looking after the needs of others, is there?
And yes, money is a pressure on this too, because even with a good job, the "minimum" amount of entertainment and enjoyment frequency necessary for an individual has a high cost. We aren't designed to want to "go without", but we are designed to keep putting things off until times are better. And, because we keep putting things off and times don't improve that much, we are never ready to take the next step. And the longer we wait, the bigger that step feels.
I love being a parent, as it is incredibly rewarding in many ways, including finding things out about myself that I am pretty sure I wouldn't have otherwise. However, it is also hard to be a parent, which is why it isn't for everyone. I read so many sad stories of badly neglected children whose parents just had better things to do than even attempt to raise them properly.
And then this has an affect on other aspects of life too, where for instance the drug addicts are getting younger and younger, because they are giving up on trying to have a decent life earlier. It all seems so hopeless, especially when there are no longer many good role models to shine a light on the path and to lead by example. Just look at the leaders chosen, and the celebrities that people follow - not many of them are the type of people who you would want as a role model for children, yet they are famous because they have millions of followers, because they are rich, because they will debase themselves for more attention.
Parents have it hard. Kids have it hard.
Yet, being a parent is one of the most important things a person can do, isn't it? Just think about the billions of parents in the past that have got us to this point as a species, and now we have reduced the role down to be meaningless to the point that people don't even want to do it, because it gets in the way of their social calendar. Like it or not, if we want a better world, we need better parents.
Which sucks.
Because at least in my opinion, there is a growing spread between parent quality these days, and the bottom keeps getting lower. It might come back to the amount of choices again, or it could be that the foundation is just not as solid as it once was. We tend to resemble our parents in more than just looks.
There are good parents out there of course, but because local communities have been weakened to the point of non-existence in many areas, and the brightness of the screens, they get lost in the crowd of entertainment. They go unnoticed, with no parties, no award show, no praise or thanks from society for doing a good job - those things are saved for the celebrities and the wealthy - and the types of people you wouldn't want near children.
Role models.
I have so much more to reflect upon with this topic.
Mostly because I fail daily at being the kind of parent my daughter deserves.
Taraz
[ Gen1: Hive ]
