I'd had a very negitive experience with psychiatry. Although I was brought in a t a young age. I not only didn't have a say in this, but was told it was my only hope basically. I didn't like that I had them to write their own narative about me. They didn't understand me and they knew it. They even basically admitted this. They wouldn't come right out and say it.
Hence basically. They still made their authority known.
I wanted to make it work though. It would be much easier to just accept and work with them. In the end thought they're not compromising. They're an authotatian group that has the law backing them up. I was all set to have a physical test. They wouldn't do it. It turns out the chemical imbalance was made up. Once I figured that out they were unapologetic and still claiming authority in this. However that's a long story. Point is I reluctantly and progressively decided to take a stance after hard truths, blatnant lies about myself and coarsion. Not to mention years of it being heard or listened to.
However, people who were against psychiatry, or simply for informed choice and/ or alternatives were always labeled Scientologists. In fact any criticism could land you with accusations and dismissal of "being a Scientologist". There was the accusations about Scientology. They ranged from stuff I found frivolous to serious accusations. Many of which resembled mine and others experience with psychiatry. However given the context like the lack of knowledge about psychiatry( parts blatnelty false, and just over all response what I wrote left me questioning. Scientologists to me, when I didn't know really the first thing about it. I hadn't mentioned it. Many of what I said was officially backed by the psychiatry's standards.
Many more was confirmed by public psychiatrists and those I knew. Not to mention those with extensive experience, and/ or their loved ones. Agreeing on one issue was irrelevant.
At the same time I didn't want to compared to Scientology, because I didn't know if they were alright I didn't want to bash them like what I was expected to, because they may be alright. There was also that baggage on top of the critics of psychiatry already had. I thought 'Scientology may very be an incredibly altruistic group with all the best intentions who really help people'. However, I wanted to do the Antipsychiatry/ critics of psychiatry, and even consumer advocates, as well as Scientology justice by holding off on it. I tried really hard to tell people what was happening in psychiatry that could actually be proven. That I didn't know about Scientology, and could only comment on what I heard. It was a lot of hearsay and speculation. My sources on these matters were shaky as well. I pointed out there was proof psychiatry did the things they accused Scientology of. The very thing that made me a Scientologist supposedly for criticizing.
However that's what ultimately made me realize I'd seen enough to know that Scientology was being treated unfairly.
It just became more and more apparent. The authorities on anti Scientology were not better than the trolls which I initially hoped for. Offer egging them on or feeding my into it. They also didn't acknowledge the victims of psychiatry or even call discourage us being trolled. I eventually officially identified myself as an ally. This was around the time Leah Remini had Blocked me on twitter.
Months and months after giving up trying to resolve the problem of Antipsychiatry being dragged into this, and just then abuse many of us went through etc. I'd not attempted to contact her in a while. In fact trolls had tried to bring me into her threads and unexplained she's never responded.
After looking into Scientology as an ally, I ended up deciding to join. Not, to spite psychiatry or the trolls. Not simply, because we agreed as far as psychiatry went. People try and make my decision out to be rash, or misguided. However they disregard the obvious caution I took and evidence against supposed reasoning. It was a process. Of deciding I had to stand up to the hate against them. While watching the Ecclesiastical Leader David Miscavige on Night Line. I knew a lot of the stuff regarding psychiatry, and how the Church was mistreated/ misrepresented. Although good info specifically on how Scientology helped combat psychiatries harm. What really wanted to go from being an Ally to actually trying it out myself was his account of how much it helped with his Asthma. I thought back to some my own struggles. I was inspired and thought maybe Scientology can help with some this as well. In the end I did what people were using against me before I even did. This wasn't to spite them, but despite them.
