While having a discussion with a friend on the subject of happiness some days ago, he said that "happiness comes from the state of the inside, not from what is on the outside." What he was talking about was how being contented will lead one to achieving true happiness. Happiness should not just be tied to what you have or the next achievement you want to make, it should be from the inside. As a matter of fact, if you want to wait until you have achieved enough in life before you become happy, then you will never be happy. This is because, no matter what you have achieved, there will always be what to achieve yet. This is why you need to shift your attitude from wanting more, to appreciating and being contented with what you have.
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One of the things that I have discovered in life is that the inner smile of someone is not just about being cheerful all the time nor being excited, but it comes primarily from a heart of contentment, which also triggers a heart of gratitude. That you are contented in life does not mean you have arrived at your destination, nor does it mean you have everything you want in life, but it is a feeling of satisfaction for what you have at the moment and then making the most of it. Trust me, there are lots of people who have achieved more than you, yet they are not happy with life but are taken over by desperation to achieve yet more.
Contentment does not come by possession, but it is a choice and a decision. It is also without recourse to the prevailing situations or what is happening around you. The decision to live with inner joy is one which someone makes regardless of what is happening around them. Just to let you know; what is happening within you is far more important and carries greater influence on your life than what is happening around you. The anchors upon which contentment are built on are gratitude, accepting yourself, and the ability to see beauty in everything that happens.
You will be surprised how a lot of people spend years in the purse of happiness from external things like material things, job, relationships, possessions, etc. It is true that these things can give one temporary pleasure, but if you want lasting joy and peace, then you must look beyond it - focus on contentment with life itself. If you build your happiness on external factor and it gets taken away or you lose it, what will be your fate? When your happiness is built on gratitude and on contentment, it will last. The happiness that relies solely on external factors will not be stable in the long run, but the one that flows from inside is stable and can stand the test of time.
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It is worthy to note that being contented in life does not mean that you should settle for the least, nor does it mean that you should not have future ambitions and goals. Rather, it means that you have accepted what you cannot change, and then make the most of what you have. It also means that you are not under desperation to acquire material possessions. To be contented, you also need to remove comparison and competition mentality from yourself. You are different from others, so you do not expect to have exactly what they have. Be satisfied with what you have.
In addition, you have to let go of what you do not have control off. Trying to resist what you cannot change can lead to unhappiness. Stop trying to waste time trying to fight the reality that you cannot change. A friend once said; "instead of trying to prevent the rain from falling and getting sad that it rained, you can learn to dance in the rain." This is not about rain, but just a reminder that instead of trying to control what you cannot, learn to make adjustments and accept it, then make the most of it. Always remember that happiness, as well as contentment, is a choice, not a gift.
Thanks for reading
