The other day, I was flattered with compliments about all the ways I was wonderful. I have compassion, charisma, endless love and optimism. There was one remark, however, that completely crushed me. I was told that despite all the depth and beauty within, I was being found unattractive because I had acne.
I totally lost it.
(Definitely cried on the floor of this person's house for at least two hours.)
But, I needed to hear it. I know I have acne, I actually specifically do not wear makeup because I have acne. I use it as a repellent for superficial A-holes, and I proudly display my acne because I consider it a part of my path towards fully embracing and accepting myself. The person who said it to me, I really valued his opinion, which I later realized was an important reason the Universe had him tell me this.
I'd been neglecting my Self and half-assing my eating habits. Okay, so I don't eat hot cheetos and crap food- I'm actually really good at consuming whole foods that I have to cook. But there are definitely minimal vegetables involved.
To elaborate, my food choices at the time included a lot of vegan/gluten free cooked meals like veg burgers, vegan cheeses, pastas, soups, casseroles, etc.... and tons of brie with baguette. The nutrients are probably dead in whatever I eat before it even gets on my plate just because I'm not eating a lot of raw fruits and vegetables is where I'm getting at. This might work for some people- hell my roommate who I cook/share food with has been doing great off of it- I did some research on Ayuverda and discovered my dosha type is Pitta. Apparently I wasn't supposed to be eating half of the vegan alternatives I ate such as almonds with the skin, cashews, spinach, or garlic. In short, I need lots of raw, but sweet or bitter fruits and vegetables.
The past ten days have been all about kickin' butt with my eating habits. A year or so ago, I was vegan, gluten free, salt free, non-fruit sugar free, and I'm doing the same thing now except skipping foods on the avoid-side of my Pitta food plan (most root veggies, garlic, spinach, onions, lentils, excess tomato...). It's actually going incredibly for me! I've definitely noticed that my skin doesn't get inflamed and when it does, I can feel the heat in my mouth from a specific food I've eaten. I really feel more in tune with my Self's body. I'm supposed to balance both yin and yang food, so I did eat a little bit of spinach but I'm going to take the time to decide if I should totally stick to yin food.
Here's what I just finished eating. My visual side is having a lot of fun with "eating all the colors."
Cherry tomatoes, avocado, arugula, lettuce, kale, spinach. Black beans, squash, mushrooms, sweet potato, sunflower seeds, and sprouted pumpkin seeds
This lifestyle is very tedious and requires a lot of involvement. I love the accomplishment of remembering to soak my beans, chickpeas, and oats the night before but I can't really pick up anything already made for an "easy dinner." Of course, this has its ups and downs.
All in all, I'm grateful that my 'friend' said what he did, because I would have kept finding excuses to cheat on being vegan/gluten free- which at this point I wasn't just cheating but totally OD'ing on brie. Here's what I used to eat and what I opt for now.
Breakfast: Over easy eggs with avocado -> Toasted oat meal with fruit, or
Snack: PIZZA -> Sugar free coconut creme yogurt (I eat COYO) with fruit, hemp hearts, pecans, or other nuts.
Lunch: Anything. -> Roasted veggies, quinoa with rice combo, and/or salad with fruits, sesame seeds, sunflower seeds, assrt nuts, sprouted pumpkin seeds (I love those lil guys), and tumeric + nutritional yeast.
Snack: More pizza or chicken --> Fruit.
Dinner: I used to eat whatever I was in the mood for, but a lot of it didn't match my dosha. --> Since I am home at this point, I'll either eat something similar to lunch like buddha bowls or make the effort to create a compatible dish. The past ten days since I've started have actually been different variants of Buddha bowls and tacos, but I've been dreaming of a basil stir fry to whip up.
Post Dinner Snack (~11PM): I normally would eat dinner around this time or just skip food entirely -> Now I have a Protein shake with collagen, flax seeds, super foods.
Yeah, I know I eat a lot. I probably can't even consider my snacks to be "snacks," since when I snack, it's enough to feed two hungry children. I started my lunar cycle a few days ago so I can't even tell whether or not the diet has helped my acne but I'm really happy to be back eating this way. There was a point after a few months of eating so strictly, I could hear trees talk to me. That's another story. My acne isn't even that bad, honestly. It's cleared up a lot since moving to Oregon from Texas in June 2017, and most of it is scarring. I don't know. Definitely looking at this entire situation from a positive light, because I definitely needed someone or something to get me to quit pitifully eating all the BS I was.
Feel free to share your favorite recipes with me before I run out of things to cook for myself. I'm pretty good at switching out ingredients to best suit my needs, so don't be afraid to share! Thank you :)
