Last week, someone I considered a friend came to me and begged me to lend her some money. She explained her situation, and honestly, the way she spoke made me feel that she really needed the help. So, I decided to lend her the money.
But right now, the story is different. I'm the one begging her to give me back my money, and somehow, she feel that I'm disturbing her too much. She no longer picks up my calls, and honestly, I don't even know what to make of the whole situation.
Imagine lending someone money when they need it, only to find yourself begging for your own money when you need it back. How did we get here?
What I find difficult to understand is why some people behave this way. When they need money, they know how to call you, explain their problems, and beg you to help them. They can even make promises about when they will pay you back. But when the time comes, everything suddenly changes.
Now, you're the one calling, sending messages, and trying to get their attention. The same person who was once begging you for help is now making you feel like you're disturbing their peace.
Sometimes, you will even hear things like, "Is it because of the little money I'm owing you that you don't want me to rest?"
Honestly, what exactly is wrong with asking for money that belongs to you?
Sometimes, I wonder what goes through the minds of people who behave this way. Do they think that because someone lent them money, that person no longer has personal needs? Do they think the money they borrowed is no longer important to the person who gave it to them?
The most annoying part is that you might not even have enough money yourself when they come asking for help. You could have other things you wanted to do with that money, but because you care about them or don't want to leave them stranded, you decide to help.
Yet, when you need that same money back, you suddenly become a problem.
What hurts me is not even just the money. It's the way someone you considered a friend can make you feel for asking for what belongs to you. I thought friendship meant that we could be honest with each other, even when things were difficult. If you don't have the money to pay me back yet, why not tell me? Why ignore my calls and make me feel like I'm doing something wrong?
I understand that life happens. Sometimes, people genuinely experience financial difficulties, and things might not go according to plan. I don't expect anyone to perform magic or produce money out of nowhere.
But there is a difference between being unable to pay and refusing to communicate with the person you owe.
If you call me and explain that things are difficult, I can at least understand your situation. We can talk about it and agree on another time. But when you stop answering my calls, what exactly am I supposed to think?
Am I now supposed to forget about my money because I don't want to disturb you? Should I pretend that everything is fine just to protect a friendship that you don't seem to care about anymore?
And the funny thing is that if you eventually get tired and stop asking for your money, the person might assume that you have forgotten about it. Meanwhile, you could still be thinking about the money and the things you needed it for.
Sometimes, I feel that lending money can reveal a side of people you never knew existed. You might have known someone for years and considered them a good friend, but once money enters the picture, the relationship begins to change.
It makes me wonder whether some people actually appreciate the help they receive or whether they only appreciate it when it benefits them.
Because, to be honest, I don't think asking someone to repay a debt should automatically turn you into a bad person. You helped them when they needed you. Why should asking for that money back make you their enemy?
The experience has also made me think twice about lending money to people. Not because I don't want to help anyone, but because I don't want to find myself in a situation where I have to beg for my own money and feel guilty for doing so.
The truth is, everybody has their own struggles. The fact that I agreed to lend you money doesn't mean my own needs disappeared. I also have responsibilities, plans, and things I need money for.
Sometimes, people forget that the person helping them is also human.
Honestly, I don't know whether to be angry, disappointed, or just laugh at the whole situation. I never imagined that asking for my money back could make things this uncomfortable between me and someone I considered a friend.
It's as if I'm doing something wrong by asking for my money, and it's so tiring.