隆Hola, linda comunidad de Hive!馃А| Hello, beautiful Hive community!馃А
Mi nombre es Mar铆a Jos茅 y soy una de las personas con peor suerte en el amor que van a conocer jajaja as铆 que voy a compartir con ustedes una parte de mi conocimiento sobre un pensamiento que pienso todas las parejas deben tener claro: La reciprocidad es clave para una relaci贸n... Bueno, para una relaci贸n SANA que es importante.
My name is Maria Jose and I am one of the unluckiest people in love you will ever meet hahaha so I am going to share with you a part of my knowledge about a thought that I think all couples should be clear about: Reciprocity is key to a relationship.... Well, for a HEALTHY relationship that is important.
Para quienes no est谩n totalmente claros la reciprocidad est谩 definida como la correspondencia mutua de una persona, entonces teniendo claro esto podemos decir que creo que s铆 bastante entendible el por qu茅 digo que es clave para una relaci贸n sana. Durante mucho tiempo cre铆 que lo m谩s indispensable en una relaci贸n era la comunicaci贸n porque seg煤n yo todos los problemas pod铆an resolverse hablando pero al crecer pude entender que de nada sirve comunicar si la otra persona no est谩 dispuesta a comprometerse con la situaci贸n y personalmente creo que no se trata de cambiar sino de MEJORAR para estar en plenitud con la persona que se supone quieres en tu futuro.
For those who are not totally clear reciprocity is defined as the mutual correspondence of a person, so having this clear we can say that I think it is quite understandable why I say that it is key to a healthy relationship. For a long time I believed that the most indispensable thing in a relationship was communication because according to me all problems could be solved by talking but as I grew up I could understand that it is useless to communicate if the other person is not willing to compromise with the situation and personally I believe that it is not about changing but about IMPROVING to be in fullness with the person you are supposed to want in your future.
Peero eso no es todo, porque 驴Que hacemos cuando estamos dando lo mejor de nosotros y sentimos que no estamos recibiendo lo mismo? O peor a煤n que todos nuestros esfuerzos no son valorados? A ese punto quiero llegar, al punto d贸nde la palabra "mutuo" no funciona y nos encontramos entre la espada y la pared porque no sabemos que hacer, esto nos lleva a sentirnos tristes porque sentimos que la relaci贸n ya no da para m谩s y para m铆 es uno de los sentimientos MAS FEOS que existe, esa sensaci贸n de querer estar con alguien pero que no funcione porque no te sientes c贸modo con las cosas que pasan y no saber c贸mo resolverlo porque (retomando el tema anterior) comunicas el problema pero no se trabaja para resolverlo. Durante mis cortos 21 a帽os de vida solo he tenido dos noviazgos, el primero a mis 13 a帽os que significo mi primer amor, mi primera ilusi贸n y como podr谩n imaginar: mi primer coraz贸n roto. Con 17 a帽os termine con el coraz贸n en las manos porque decid铆 no aceptar migajas de amor y aunque me doli贸 mucho fue el comienzo de un largo camino para aceptar que hice lo correcto por mi y mi estabilidad emocional.
But that's not all, because what do we do when we are giving our best and we feel that we are not receiving the same? Or even worse that all our efforts are not valued? That's the point I want to get to, the point where the word "mutual" doesn't work and we find ourselves between a rock and a hard place because we don't know what to do, this leads us to feel sad because we feel that the relationship is over and for me is one of the ugliest feelings that exists, that feeling of wanting to be with someone but it doesn't work because you don't feel comfortable with the things that happen and not knowing how to solve it because (going back to the previous topic) you communicate the problem but you don't work to solve it. During my short 21 years of life I've only had two engagements, the first one when I was 13 years old which meant my first love, my first illusion and as you can imagine: my first broken heart. At the age of 17 I ended up with my heart in my hands because I decided not to accept crumbs of love and although it hurt me a lot it was the beginning of a long road to accept that I did the right thing for me and my emotional stability.
No dir茅 que me promet铆 no volverme a enamorar porque yo soy una fan谩tica del romance y amo el amor aunque eso me haya salido mal muchas veces jajajaja la realidad es que si evite bastante caer de nuevo en esa posici贸n porque sent铆a que no era el momento adecuado, que quiz谩s con el tiempo yo maduraria m谩s y conseguir铆a a alguien con mis mismos niveles de compromiso por un amor bonito, as铆 paso el tiempo mientras yo ten铆a f茅 de que alg煤n d铆a conseguir铆a no a mi alma gemela sino un alma para acompa帽arnos en el lindo viaje que es la vida. Puedo decir que crec铆, madure y mi analog铆a del amor cambio demasiado porque antes pensaba que se trataba de un ser que me completar铆a pero eso est谩 muy alejado de la realidad.
NI will not say that I promised myself not to fall in love again because I am a fan of romance and I love love love although that has gone wrong many times hahahaha the reality is that I avoided falling back into that position because I felt that it was not the right time, that maybe with time I would mature more and get someone with my same levels of commitment for a beautiful love, so time passed while I had faith that someday I would get not my soul mate but a soul to accompany us on the beautiful journey that is life. I can say that I grew up, matured and my analogy of love changed too much because before I thought it was about a being that would complete me but that is far from reality.
馃敻馃敹Mi analog铆a del amor馃敹馃敻
馃敻馃敹My analogy of love馃敹馃敻
Recuerdan eso que dicen sobre la media naranja? Bueno en mi caso creo que todos somos unas empanadas muy sabrosas (o teque帽os, como prefieran), en mi caso prefiero ser una empanada de carne mechada porque me encantan jajajaja y de por s铆 una empanada de mechada (o teque帽o de queso) sola ES S脷PER SABROSA, pero cuando le ponemos alg煤n aderezo? Se vuelve MUCHO MAS SABROSA!!! Eso es para m铆 el amor, el aderezo de la empanada, porque aunque la hace m谩s sabrosa sin ese aderezo YA LO ES! Con el tiempo he entendido que el amor no debe ser algo que te complete sino que te complemente... Esa es mi analog铆a del amor y el motivo por el que no estaba de acuerdo con la analog铆a de la media naranja, es porque eso significar铆a que somos personas incompletas y eso no me convence para nada.
Remember what they say about the better half? Well in my case I think we are all very tasty empanadas (or teque帽os, as you prefer), in my case I prefer to be a shredded meat empanada because I love them hahahaha and by itself a shredded meat empanada (or cheese teque帽o) alone IS SUPER TASTY, but when we put some toppings? It becomes MUCH MORE TASTEFUL!!! That is love for me, the dressing of the empanada, because even though it makes it tastier without that dressing it ALREADY IS! Over time I have come to understand that love should not be something that completes you but that complements you..... That's my analogy of love and the reason why I didn't agree with the better half analogy is because that would mean that we are incomplete people and that doesn't convince me at all.
Quiz谩s sea algo dram谩tico de mi parte pero para m铆 el amor sin reciprocidad no sirve porque no te hace sentir pleno, un poco radical para ser honesta jajajajaja pero creo que nadie deber铆a estar en una relaci贸n d贸nde no recibas todo el amor que das, aunque tampoco puedo negar que todos somos seres humanos y no todo el tiempo las relaciones son 50/50 porque por cualquier motivo y por periodos de tiempo entendibles pueden ser 20/80, 60/40, 30/70 y eso est谩 bien porque no todo el tiempo estamos dando todo de nosotros! Siempre y cuando no sea todo el tiempo as铆.
Maybe it's a bit dramatic on my part but for me love without reciprocity is useless because it doesn't make you feel full, a bit radical to be honest hahahahahaha but I think no one should be in a relationship where you don't receive all the love you give, although I can't deny that we are all human beings and not all the time relationships are 50/50 because for whatever reason and for understandable periods of time they can be 20/80, 60/40, 30/70 and that's okay because not all the time we are giving all of us! As long as it's not all the time like that.
El amor no es solo cosas materiales, no es solo un momento de cari帽os y en definitiva, no es solo sexo. El amor es una conexi贸n especial que se construye para el bienestar de ambos y para lograrlo es necesario tener conversaciones inc贸modas. Es aceptar defectos, es mejorar para hacer que funcione, decidir amarse cada d铆a y sobretodo, para el verdadero amor deber谩s crecer y madurar para entender lo que realmente debes hacer. Creo que ya no tengo nada m谩s que decir adem谩s de darles un recordatorio: D贸nde no te hagan sentir la estrella m谩s brillante del cielo, ah铆 no es. V谩lido para todos los g茅neros.
Love is not just material things, it is not just a moment of affection and ultimately, it is not just sex. Love is a special connection that is built for the well-being of both and to achieve it is necessary to have uncomfortable conversations. It is accepting flaws, it is improving to make it work, deciding to love each other every day and above all, for true love you will have to grow and mature to understand what you should really do. I don't think I have anything more to say other than to give you a reminder: Where they don't make you feel like the brightest star in the sky, that's not where it's at. Valid for all genders.
"Cuando no se acompa帽a de esfuerzo y trabajo en equipo, a veces el amor no es suficiente."
"When not accompanied by effort and teamwork, sometimes love is not enough."
Espero que les haya gustado mi post, muchas gracias por leerme! 馃А
I hope you liked my post, thank you very much for reading!馃А