How do you capture a polar bear? Cut a big fishing hole in the ice. Wait for the polar bear to bend over the hole to fish. Then run up behind the polar bear and **kick it in the icehole!**
""What if a third team came and attacked these two teams?"" - my daughter, not understanding football/making football more awesome
What did the girl's suicide note say when she hung herself? *sings* I WANNA SWIIIING FROM THE CHANDELIERRRRRR
Why was the baguette excited for his audition? He heard he might be playing a big roll
What do you call the secret Eskimo organization that controls the world? The Igloominati.