American Ninja Warrior is a bunch of people who took ""the floor is lava"" game way to seriously as kids.
Which part of a billiards setup can you use to clean your ears? The cue tip.
What is the longest sentence in the English language? ""I do.""
The good thing about having a lot of followers is that for every thousand there's about one who actually reads your tweets.
I bet all those girls that ignored me in high school would still be pretty pleased with that decision