What time do you go to the dentist? 2:30
Why did the nuke switch course? Because a girl on the ground said ""I have a boyfriend"" later that day the nuke fell into depression
Don't worry if a fat guy comes to kidnap you... I told Santa all I want for Christmas is you.
What gets higher with age? Willie Nelson
Guy passes a buff guy on the street and asks, ""Are you a pole vaulter?"" He says, ""No, I'm German. How did you know my name was Walter?""