[last supper] drunk jesus: *swinging baguette wildly* You want a piece of me!?
Q: Why did the mother of twins name both of her sons Edward? A: Because two Eds are better than one.
What does a gay horse eat? Haaaaay
The package says ""Do not eat raw cookie dough"" but all I really see is ""Pillsbury hates you and doesn't want you to be happy.""
I nicknamed my urethra, Franklin.