"You cannot go back and change the beginning but you can start where you are and change the ending", this is according to Clives Staples Lewis made.
The fact that we have failed trying out something doesn't define the end of our endeavours about such an adventure. The real definition of failure is at the moment that you have willingly accepted defeat and have convinced yourself not to try again. In most cases, life decisions are decided within the strength of philosophy that one's mind can carry. The moment a person's mind has started accepting defeat, it has already accepted failure but when a person's mind is strongly deep rooted in persistence and perseverance, then it becomes difficult for such a person to fail in any circumstance.
To be honest, the difference between two who successfully pass a stage and the other who couldn't, is the mentality they had when they approached that stage.
This reminds me of twin brothers Ake and Ace, who gained admission into the university at the same time. Their father was the definition of a crack head. He drinks, smokes, gamble, womanizes and even perpetuates violence in their family.
Ake was the rebellious one while Ace was the mild one. Ake was very outspoken and so many times he has challenged his father character and decisions. Other times he has been vocal about moving out and never coming back home ever. While Ace behaved in a more understanding way. He doesn't challenge situations, he just tries to avoid unnecessary confrontation and perhaps observe situations and learn how he could always manoeuvre his way out of difficult situations. But one thing that both Ake and Ace wished was to move out.
Getting admission into the university gave them both the liberty to achieve what they have always wished for. That had gotten to a place of freedom and the stage of being responsible for their actions seen that no parents would be available to scold or criticize their actions.
Ake being the more extroverted one, he quickly made lots of friends in the campus. Not quite long, they introduced him to lots of campus lifestyle such as clubbing and attending private students' house parties. There he learnt how to smoke and drink just like his father.
On the other hand, Ace has been very enthusiastic about knowledge acquisition. He is particularly interested in the area of justice in life therefore he took studies so serious. He was studying law, but seldom would try reading into other fields such as philosophy and theology. He was so interested in knowledge acquisition so much that he wished he could study all the courses available in the university.
Long story short, both Ake and Ace graduated and with good grades anyways. But Ake before graduation has grown into the same man that he would always criticize while Ace grew into a man that was completely opposite of who their father was.
When they were invited home to celebrate their graduation, one of their uncle came visiting and that day he asked them same question, that both had given same answers but the answers communicated different meanings.
"Ake, why did you turn out to be who you are today?" Uncle Femi ask
"I am who i am today because of daddy" Ake answered
"What of you Ace, why did you turn out to be who you are today?" Uncle Femi repeated
"It obviously because of our daddy " Ace replied still.
"Can both of you explain further?" Uncle Femi requested as he giggled in laughs
"Well, i started drinking and smoking because i learnt from my father to do so, that's very simple" Ake answered defensively.
"My own is, i didn't like the kind of man daddy was, so i made it my decision to become better than him " Ace said so reluctantly.
Uncle Femi stood up, shook hands with Ace, laughed with him and walk off.
The difference between Ake and Ace is nothing but their state of mind. How their minds processed their father's lifestyle translated into how it influenced them. Ace saw a change while Ake saw emulation. Ake had continued in the path of their father but Ace made sure that the lifestyle that was at the beginning of his father doesn't determine the end of his on lifestyle. Hence, he wasn't able to change the beginning, but he started a conscious effort to change his ending.
This is the beauty of self reflection.
