Most of the friendships I’ve lost weren’t even due to fights or arguments. It was more of life happening. At some point into the friendship. We just slowly drifted apart. Either they moved away from the neighborhood, or we just grew into different people. I still see a few of them around, we exchange greetings, maybe throw in a smile, but it’s not deep anymore. They’ve found new people, and honestly, I get it. That whole idea of “forever friends” doesn’t always work. Life changes people. Except this one time I intentionally let go of a friend.
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Have you ever been close to someone who just doesn’t know how to shut up? I mean, no filter whatsoever, always talking, always inserting herself into things that don’t concern her. That was the case with this girl I used to be really close to. We were practically everywhere together, same neighborhood, same school, and our mums had shops close to each other. So, anytime she came to her mum’s shop, we would go home together and gist. It made sense that we clicked at the time.
She talked too much and was incredibly nosy. And unfortunately, that habit of hers got her into a lot of trouble with people. Being her close friend, I sometimes found myself in the middle of unnecessary drama. I tried to talk to her about it, about maybe just minding her business or at least learning when to stop. But she never listened. There was a particular day I’ll never forget, a Older woman scolded me right in the middle of the road over a rumor in the neighborhood. Meanwhile, I wasn’t even the one who said anything. It was my friend running her mouth again. I was just guilty by association. I couldn't even back out because obviously people saw us together, so if she's in on something, they just assume I'm part of it too. That day was all so embarrassing because I'm someone who minds my business very much.
Still, I stuck around longer because asides her been such a talker, I just liked her, until the final straw, I confided in her about something very personal. Something I clearly told her not to tell anyone. And guess what? Someone else came to ask me about that same issue not long after. I was so mad. I knew she was the only one I had told, so there was no way to pretend. When I confronted her, she denied it flat out. I mean, how do you lie with such confidence? At that point, I was done. I just stopped talking to her. No long talk. She didn’t even reach out to apologize, and that told me everything I needed to know.
Looking back now, I don’t regret walking away. Of course, there were signs I chose to ignore, but as at that point I think we both knew it was time to end the friendship. Not everyone who comes into your life stays. But I definitely not a fan of friendships where I'm not comfortable with someone. And that’s why I decided chose my peace instead.
