~ Jocko Willink ~
I've been going through a substantial transformation of late and with it has come a lot of responsibility, change, attitude adjustment and thought provocation.
You see, the choices that I've made to change my career, my location and my personal investment into myself has come from a greater need. A need to succeed and a need to change my circumstances. I've been in a low place for some time and when the chance to change that came about through an opportunity, I grabbed it with both hands knowing that it was a small step towards my ultimate goal.
The ultimate goal I'm choosing not to share here as it is rather sensitive in nature, but the ramifications of my changes will be vast and potentially problematic for a while, but I know that I will prevail. So the long working hours that I've been putting in, the fewer hours of sleep, the long driving time to work and the stress levels I'm experiencing are in a way worth it as they are all necessary sacrifices in order for me to fulfil a promise that I have made to myself and to another.
The emotions that have come with it have been turbulent and sometimes overwhelming, but I have fought against the negative ones and the little many voices of doubt that have reared their heads when I'm in a time crunch or a particularly difficult project because I have to keep reminding myself of the ultimate goal and the cost I am willing to pay to get there.
There have also been positives. I have excelled in certain aspects of my new job and have been thanked for my perseverance during the difficulties, the tenacity that I have to get the job done no matter what and the contribution towards the team. That has helped me to continue going each day and push myself just that little bit further and just a little harder towards excellence and I've learned so much in a very short space of time.
With the end of the month and my first pay checque that has cleared, I found myself feeling rather anti-climatic because it felt a shallow victory for me. But it was still a victory and so I have had to attitude adjust myself again and be grateful that I've had this opportunity and that it may lead to something greater that will push me closer to my next portion of the ultimate end result.
It's going to be a long, tough road and I never expected it to be easy, but today, I was so tired I slept in for most of the day. My body and mind were telling me what I needed to be able to carry on with this quest and keep pushing forward. I needed to be awake at 4am to go to a public event and sacrifice my weekend. Something I'm willing to do when remembering the reason I'm doing this. Sometimes it's all that we can do - have a mantra that you repeat continuously in your mind to keep putting one foot ahead of the other and move forwards.
The image is mine
