I must admit, I've been feeling rather bleak for a couple of days, slipping in and out of my thoughts on nights that sleep seemed to be at loggerheads with me. I can't deny that I've been physically and mentally strained, tired and exhausted with nothing to keep me going but the sheer force of willpower which was already thinning by the way. It was like a little fire blazing underneath, somewhere......somehow that just kept me going.
Last night was one of such nights when sleep stayed very, very far away from me. It seemed like the more I tried to force it's hand, the more alert to my surroundings I became. I yielded eventually and sat up till the wee hours of dawn, watching others sleep. I was pissed off, snappy and frustrated because I actually needed to rest. I'd had a long week and I could feel the strain on my muscles, like my blood had been tainted with lead and my bones hard as stone. I was nothing short of tired and in a desperate need for rejuvenation so much so that at that point in time, you could liken me to a traveller on a barren wasteland. His throat parched from thirst, his lips cracked from lack of moisture, his stomach seized by the claws of hunger, his feet weary but still trudging along, even as the harsh winds bit into his skin and the sun beat down on him mercilessly shining with all it's might and the water from rain soaked him to his bones, it couldn't outshine his light, his hope, his determination. It couldn't put out his flame.....my flame.
At the first light of dawn, I got up, said my prayers, got dressed and stepped out into the morning breeze. I had already planned to go jogging this morning and I wasn't going to let fatigue deter me cause deep down, I knew I needed it. I boarded a tricycle to the stadium in my area, exchanged short pleasantries with the few people present and went right to the track. Already armed with my earpiece and phone, I navigated my playlist and picked a song.
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I stood still for a while, letting the breeze and music engulf me. For a minute there, I felt like I was on another plane and gradually, that gloomy feeling went with the breeze....it was literally chased by the wind.
As I went round the track, my music blasting in my ears, my thoughts pushed to the far corners of my mind, I felt pumped, I felt charged, I could literally feel the fire within illuminating the darkness.....I felt unstoppable, like I could do anything..... unbeatable cause my pain and fears were mine to conquer....I felt raw power as I ran with the wind. By the time I had finished and done a few basic workouts to release the tension in my muscles, I literally felt lighter....that feeling of relief you get when you put down a heavy load. I instantly felt much more better and it's ironic innit because I had worked my body very hard but I came out feeling a lot better and lighter. All ill feelings of dread, gloom, worry and frustration were gone and long forgotten, lost like the city of Atlantis.
By the time I got home, I knew that I hadn't brought back those funky feelings I went out with in the morning. I was cheerful, bubbly and indeed sleepy so I did just that. I took a cold shower, had brunch and drifted to sleep. I finally got my well-deserved rest.
Lead and last image is mine. Thank you for reading馃挌.
