All we can do is stay strong

Man, I have no idea where to even begin. This past week has been a real whirlwind of emotions. A couple weeks ago, my wife's leg started to hurt pretty bad and we thought that she had just been working out too hard on it, so she quit running and tried to let it recover, but it just kept getting progressively worse.

The pain was getting worse just about each day, so she scheduled an appointment to see our doctor, but we had to wait a week or so to be seen. She went in for Xrays and it didnt look like there was anything wrong with the actual muscle or joint in her knee, so they scheduled an MRI because she was beginning to lose range of motion on her leg and the doctors let us know that she has a tumor on her femur.

Now being told that you have a tumor is scary enough, but then they told us that they want to wait a few months and get another MRI to see if it has grown. So we scheduled another appointment with a specialist to get another opinion. Over the last week, I watched my wife very quickly lose even more range of motion, to the point where she cannot even do certain stretches or yoga positions.

We have another appointment in a couple hours and hopefully we are able to get some answers and direction from here. We have no idea if it is cancerous or not. This whole waiting thing is probably the hardest part of everything. The pain in her leg seems to get worse each day, and seeing her lose the ability to do certain things is gut wrenching.

I really have no idea what I am going to try and accomplish with writing about any of this here on Hive, but one thing I have learned over the years is that writing is one of the best ways to lighten the burden, even if no one reads it.

Times like this really put life into perspective. Before we knew about the tumor, my wife started going to a clinic that administers ketamine in small doses to help with depression, anxiety and other trauma. It is a very interesting process and I think this was the perfect time for her to start it and the rest of our family will most likely take part in the procedures as well.

My wife and I have been through so much in our time together. It is crazy to think back through everything our marriage has endured. We are definitely at our strongest right now and I am grateful for that. I have no idea how much the future is going to cost us, but one thing is for certain, is that I am grateful for Hive and for the entire Hive community. If I didn't have Hive, the financial burden for the future would be crazy.

I think that is all for now. It is pretty exhausting to try and put my feelings into words right now. Hold your family tight.