We only spoke inside closed doors and tinted windows. I never got to see your smile, and you never saw my eyes. We were always in darkness. But we loved it. I never asked for more, and you never tried to hold my hand.
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Inside that darkness, I saw your world through your words just the same way you saw mine. We spoke of galaxies and specks of dust. I was sometimes led to spill my demons, but you never showed me yours. Maybe they were scared of me, or it was just you being you. Either ways, I never pushed.
We were too comfortable in the darkness that we forgot about the light. Neither of us brought out a candle to see better or clearer for we only needed the outline of our bodies. Not to caress, but to see and feel each other's presence.
It was all good until I was alone. I never felt you back away from me. You just disappeared. No trace. No sound. Nothing.
I only had your name, so I followed that one string, hoping it will lead me to you. We always shied away from expectations, but that didn't save me from what I've found on the end of that one string.
I refused to listen to the words that were shoved at my face. I couldn't believe the stories they told about you. They were all bent and broken in a way as if you hid your soul from them. I nodded my head and tried to hide my disgust from the hideous world you were forced to lived in.
I realized too early that they never heard you laugh. If they did, they wouldn't be telling me these stories. It was all lies. Piles and piles of lies. But out of curiosity, I followed them.
I hated black clothes, but I forced myself to wear one. I hated funerals but I still went. I saw as they cried and screamed your name. I felt nothing. No tears came for I believed the lady in the wooden box wouldn't be you.
I waited till they all left. I slowly approached the casket and lifted the lid. The lady was no stranger. I had come across her once, but I didn't know her name. Still, no tears came. Right when I was about to close the wooden frame I saw the faint on the edge of her folded hands. I froze.
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I stared at it long and hard till the memories collided. Then I saw more scars. I saw all they tried to hide in the expensive gown you wore. It was YOU. I recognized your pain and I knew I had found you.
For reasons that were beyond my knowledge, I laughed. They heard me, and before I knew it I was pulled out from the room you were kept in. They saw me break apart. But I wasn't done. I went back to our dark room and broke the windows and let the light in. It burned my skin, but it allowed me to see...EVERYTHING.
I painted our sorrow and joy. I traced your smile on your broken lips. I felt you wiping my tears. I remembered the day you bared yourself in front of me. And now in the light I saw you. That was when the first tear fell.
I went back after some hours. I refused to wear black this time around, so I wore your favorite color, blue. They wouldn't have let me in, but they saw my broken eyes and let me through silently.
I walked to your casket once again and stood beside you. You were trapped in the eternal darkness, and I was standing in the light. I mourned the loss of your soul. I opened your casket and saw your beautiful face. I wished to see your eyes. I wished to feel your heartbeat.
I regretted all the time we never had. I bent over to feel your lips on mine. And then I prayed for the same miracle, the same magic that once raised Snow White to bring you back to me.
