Women are special creatures on earth. The silence they bear, the pressure they face, the demands of society, recognizing themselves, choosing themselves daily, and not allowing their voices to be silenced are some of the things that make their journey unique.
There are things some will say, such as, “You have no problem because everything is set; you don't need to work hard because you are a woman.” It leaves me thinking if being a woman automatically means that everything is set for her, who then will foot her bills?. Still, in the same society, there is the pressure placed on married women that some might not see. Household chores can be so draining—waking up every morning to prepare food and still being the last to sleep, attending to the needs of every member of the house, trying to be the perfect wife and mother, and making sure everyone's needs are met. Sometimes, no one is there to attend to Mum's needs. She carries hers and everyone else's, and everyone sees her as a super mum who has no problems. But does her silence really mean she is fine?.
Nursing a baby from childhood to adulthood itself comes with responsibilities that cannot always be explained. All these silent burdens women bear make them unique and beautiful, and yet some are not appreciated for all these.
So, sometimes, it is not surprising to see a young lady wanting to find her purpose before deciding to get married. Yet, societal pressure can make her feel as though she has made the wrong decision for not deciding to go into marriage in the early years of her life. Pressure from family reminds her that she is not getting any younger. Society reminds her that a woman's reproductive system has a certain span, without really taking her own feelings and fears into consideration.
But what about the women who eventually accept marriage and later find themselves facing abuse in their homes, yet cannot leave because of the fear of what people will say? Where a woman is abused and still blamed for being abused by her husband, so hilarious. She is blamed for not being a good wife, and this is said to be the reason her husband punishes her for not being “good enough.” Sometimes, loved ones even tell her to stay simply because the man helps them financially, without considering the pain the wife is going through.
There is also the fear of walking away from a toxic relationship because of the way society sees divorced women, especially female divorcees. The negative perceptions attached to it. So sad. Some will choose to swallow everything in silence till the end. So painful!
In the case of single mothers, no one criticizes a single father in quite the same way. Sometimes, no one even remembers the father of the child. But the woman who accepted to carry the pregnancy, give birth, and raise the child despite the challenges may be labelled as undisciplined simply because of a mistake that clearly involved two parties. One person ends up carrying much of the stigma, pain, and regrets.And on and on goes the list.
Women are strong. Soft, yet resilient and strong. Even when no one celebrates you, celebrate yourself as a lady. When you are trying to please the world, do not forget yourself. Your priorities matter. Your voice matters. You are seen. You have the right to dream big and want a beautiful and peaceful life. There are women who serve as models to others. They are shining because they did not bow to pressure. We stand out, and we keep moving.
Do not lose yourself while trying to bend to societal pressure. We are extraordinary, yet delicate. She can care deeply and still have boundaries.
She can love her family and still pursue her dreams.
She can be a wife and still be an individual.
She can be a mother and still have ambitions.
She can be gentle and still say no.
She can forgive and still walk away.
She can be soft without being weak.
Yes, we can be soft without being weak.
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