It's 2016. I just finished the sales out of the trailer that is attached to my bike. I can stash around 100$ worth of bread in there, and that's more or less the production of one day. That was two times a week, plus one day selling in Ibarra. It wasn't much, but beside my gig as a cook/administrator of a restaurant, it brought in enough to live.
My father took that picture. He has since then had a stroke, and can't come back to Ecuador. Back then, it was his first visit. I was married, but not good at it. I wasn't ready for a commitment like that, spending my life with someone. We separated in 2018, I went crazy for a short period of time, was stupid and careless and trusted the wrong person and in midst of 2019, I became a father. That changed everything.
The extremes of the first years of fatherhood taught me many lessons. The value of communication, for once. That is a pillar of the relationship I'm in now, lasting, no, flourishing for over 5 years now.
It taught me the value of stability. Being reliable. Being the one that is there, always. Same flat. Same room. Same, same - but different. Changed. Each day a little, with each struggle a little bit wiser, a little bit calmer, a little more experienced, a little happier, maybe.
I cut my hair since then. I guess that's positive. It's started falling out since then, but I don't have much control over that. But it's not as noticeable now, the curls cover it up better when shorter. I never really cared about that, I just got tired of brushing my hair.
The bakery has grown a lot since then. I became a better business man. A better team leader. A better team builder, too. That team building slowly faded into community building. That community is awesome.
It's a little bit ironic that right where the perspective of that picture is now what I see when I walk out of the door of what I called home for the last 5 years. I now live where our Farmer's Market started 11 years ago. From 5 vendors to 110. It started in what is now my front patio.
I have a good life now, despite recent troubles. My daughter is growing in all senses, she's happy here, and I hope that's enough for her mother to not burn it all down - albeit she seems set to do so. Today Lily hugged me, a forever hug she said. I was so happy and so sad and so emotionally exhausted at the same time that I couldn't hold back a few tears. I tried to explain it to her. It's hard to explain big feelings to a 7 year old, but I think I made it. I have improved at that, too. Progress everywhere I look.
I don't know if I'm happier now than I was back then. That would be something interesting to discuss with a couple of beers, if I ever make it to Australia (which I hope) AND survive long enough to meet Mr. Galen Keep Private in a bar. It feels like we already talked about everything else here on the blogs. Maybe I'd ask him a few questions about his work, his private life, things he keeps protected. But mostly it would probably go directly deep into the swamp of life.
It's interesting to have those kind of rather deep conversations and discussions with seemingly total strangers. How people I've never seen impact my life and thinking through making me reflect on it. Yes, I do have those people here, too, in real life. I have my friend in Serbia with whom I've had the most life changing exchanges.
But Hive is different. And that's good. Variety in opinions, challenge by diversity, like Riverflows wrote the other day. Hive adds more of that to my life.
What are your thoughts about this topic? Please feel free to engage in any original way, including dropping links to your posts on similar topics. I'm happy to read (and curate) any quality content that is not created by LLM/AI.
Post written for the #weekend-engagement by 
This is my response to:
1/ Show a picture of a younger version of yourself (preferably a non-boring fucken selfie picture) and explain what positive changes and initiatives you've made to improve your life and develop from there to the present time.
4/ If you and I met in a bar during one of my work trips what would we talk about and why?
Thank you for reading!
