It is very satisfactory that the status of women has improved today. But everything also has a dark side. Anti-dowry and anti-domestic violence laws made in the interest of women are also being misused. Nowadays, incidents of male harassment by married women are becoming common. The staunch feminists are working day and night to prove that men are monsters. We have tried to present the facts by investigating many of their claims which are as follows:
Feminist: An innocent girl leaves her home to live with an unknown family.
Actual situation: Of course, where a girl leaves her maternal home and comes to live with unknown people, the boy's family hands over their house even to an unknown girl. Don’t we know that how many houses are looted by robber brides? So, it’s a mutual sacrifice from both sides.
Feminist: A girl brings dowry from her maternal home. The girl's father spends a lot on marriage, whereas the boy's father gets everything for free.
Reality: Dowry was once common in some parts of India and is still taken in UP and Bihar, but in many states, dowry is not practiced in the majority communities. In India, there was no custom of giving the girl a share in the ancestral property, hence the girl's family members avoided giving the girl a share in the ancestral property by giving some household items and jewellery to the girl. Girl’s father also encourages dowry as he search for a well settled family, even if he has to pay dowry. He doesn’t accept a poor groom for his daughter.
Feminist: The girl's father spends a lot on marriage, whereas the boy's father gets everything for free.
Reality: Earlier as well as today, the boy's father had to spend for the wedding. On behalf of the boy, they have to make clothes and jewellery for the daughter-in-law, arrange wedding processions, take buses and vehicles to the girl's house for the wedding, and pay for the band party and mare. Then after the arrival of the daughter-in-law, there is a lot of expenditure in the reception party as well.
Feminist: A housewife's entire life is spent in the kitchen, cooking, washing clothes, sweeping and raising children. Her hard work is not appreciated.
Reality: If the woman is working at home then the man also goes outside to work. In a typical Indian middle class family, many people depend on one man. He has to listen to his boss's scoldings, complete his targets, work away from home and then fulfill every request of his family. Today's women from well-to-do families have to do very little work. Sweeping, mopping, washing utensils, all this is done by the maid. There is a washing machine for washing clothes. If one just have to cook, then what's so special about it? It is the duty of all the members of the household to do their part to make the family better. Anyway, every woman have to cook for herself.
Feminist: A girl ruins her career for her husband and his family.
Reality: I myself have seen many girls who are not good at reading and writing. Their only goal is to marry an earning boy and live a comfortable life. Nowadays many girls are getting married between the age of 30-35. If a girl has not been able to get a job even by the age of 30, it means that her chances of getting a job in the future are less. In this way, marriage proves to be the best career for her.
Feminist: Girls' freedom ends after marriage.
Fact: These are old things. Many girls have many restrictions in their parents' house. So, they get real freedom after marriage. Being the mistress of the house, she runs her house as per her own wish. Many girls are never even given a phone by their families, whereas many boys gift a phone to their fiancée as soon as they get engaged. Many girls are able to learn driving only when they come to their husband's house. Girls are able to move around freely, eat, drink, wear jeans, all this only when they get married. Many girls from poor families are able to become independent only when they get married to a rich boy.
Feminists: Women have to go through domestic violence and dowry harassment.
Reality: Today, one-sided laws have been made in favor of women, which are widely misused. Under the guise of these, many evil women send their husbands and his family to jail and enjoy themselves. Many continue to have affairs outside. When they are caught, they file dowry harassment cases against the husband and his family. Many are forced into marriage by their parents. Such girls also get trapped in the affair of their ex-boyfriend and file a case against their husband. Many are unable to tolerate their husband's family because it does not give them the opportunity to do whatever they want. That's why she tried to separate her husband from his family by fighting. They get huge amount as alimony after divorce as well. If you look at the statistics of suicide, the percentage of men committing suicide is much higher than that of women.
This does not mean to say that women are bad, but in today's time many evil women are misusing the powers given to them by law. If there are evil men in the world then there are evil women too. That is why a person's gender is not the measure of his goodness and badness. It is the basic tendency of man that when he gets power, he changes from the exploited to the exploiter. It's very complex issue and every view should be given importance.
Note: This post is not anti-woman. In fact, they are still oppressed in our society, but some women blame men for all the evil of our society which make everything stereotype and unjust. So, this post is about extremists who portray men as evil for everything and forget that men can also be the victim of harassment and exploitation.
