We've all heard the phrase "live your best life" but I'm going to call this post 'Give your Best Life' in honor of those who take delight in helping others.
I receive genuine joy in helping other people out in ways that allow them to get what they need, while preserving their dignity. Having grown up in a poor family helmed by an often drunk single mother, I know what it feels to go to bed hungry.
Quiet Giving
This is one of the reasons I engage in what I call 'quiet giving' so that the person doesn't feel that they "owe" the individual that helped them out.
In the area that I live, there's a place where people can donate items for anyone who might need them. I like to drop things off just as it's about to get dark, as I know many people who might be too shy to pick them up during the day, will head there late at night when everyone's asleep.
Sometimes those in want may be too ashamed of their situation to ask for anything, and this is a good way for them to do it on the DL.
On campus, I would leave snacks in the vending machine (as well as the change), for the special needs guy who was beloved by so many at my school. Just watching the way his face lit up when he made his big finds, really made my day.
And he never knew it was me.
Policing the Policy
This is one of the reasons that I dislike some of the "helping" organizations that infest this area, and are loaded down with unwritten policies that humiliate many who seek help. My attitude is if your policy is acting as a barrier to those getting the assistance that they need, then it needs to be jettisoned.
It reminds me of the time that a blind, elderly man was turned away from a homeless shelter because he wasn't a state resident. What? He was dropped off at the bus station around midnight and taken there by the police.
The organizations "policy" was that one had to have lived in the state for 30 days in order to be considered a "resident." He's elderly with dementia, infirm and blind. His so-called "family" got tired of taking care of him and drove him across state lines in order to get rid of him.
What in the world was he supposed to do for a place to live until he "qualified" 30 days hence? The cops let him stay in a spare room overnight, and the opposite of a charm offensive began the next morning.
Bad optics is what they call what happened next, as the shelter received a flood of phone calls angry that this helpless man had been turned away in the middle of the night by this "christian" organization.
Some of the calls were from individuals and firms that donated money to keep this faux shelter in operation, and they threatened to pull their support.
Guess what happened? Well waddaya know, they did an about-face and gave the kindly old man a place to stay.
I've volunteered at soup kitchens as the door person charged with making sure that the hungry homeless people showed ID before they could be served.
Right.
I'll get right on that real soon now.
Fuck outta here. Half the people couldn't produce ID at gunpoint. So I'm supposed to shoo a woman and her five hungry kids away? Don't count on it.
You know exactly what I did, I waved them right on through. I became the king of cutting unnecessary red tape. If there isn't a good reason for it and it doesn't make sense, I'm tossing any rule that interferes with helping the needy.
Putting the Dignity of the Person First
A lot of these shelter and soup kitchen employees live in the suburbs, and despise the city residents. These putrid psychopathic Pharisees hate the poor, so much so, that you wonder why they work in a place like this in the first place. For them, it's a paycheck, nothing else.
Kind of reminds me of when Jesus was castigated by the religious leaders for healing on the Sabbath. His brilliant retort was that the law didn't say you COUILDN'T DO GOOD on the Sabbath shut them up and allowed him to continue in his mission to help the needy.
In The Bible, the book of Matthew 12 verses 9-13 it says about Jesus:
9 Now when He had departed from there, He went into their synagogue. 10 And behold, there was a man who had a withered hand. And they asked Him, saying, “Is it lawful to heal on the Sabbath?”—that they might accuse Him.
11 Then He said to them, “What man is there among you who has one sheep, and if it falls into a pit on the Sabbath, will not lay hold of it and lift it out? 12 Of how much more value then is a man than a sheep? Therefore it is lawful to do good on the Sabbath.” 13 Then He said to the man, “Stretch out your hand.” And he stretched it out, and it was restored as whole as the other. 14 Then the Pharisees went out and plotted against Him, how they might destroy Him.
I started writing this blog post late Sunday evening, and now it's crossed over into the new day of Monday. I encourage anyone who reads this to try and find novel ways to help others while always keeping the dignity of the person front and center. If you see a need, fill it. Don't wait for the person to reach the end of their rope and have to come to you and grovel for it. Today they're in need. Tomorrow it could be you. So give your BEST life.