(These quotes are originally written, formatted, themed and designed by Himshweta).

And now for my next trick, I shall proceed to tell a very old but fitting for the season Dad Joke. What is Santa Claus's wife's name? Mary Christmas!

I'll tell you a little secret. English isn't my native language. "We definitely knew that." "First of all you keep pointing that out." "Every single change you get." Yeah,

#oneliners The words "boyfriend" and "girlfriend" have recently fallen out of favor, being replaced by the gender-neutral "partner." Its a fine word, but I wish someone had

The problem with trouble shooting is that trouble shoots back. Steepshot IPFS IOS Android Web

😀 😁 😂😰 Steepshot IPFS IOS Android Web

Beijing (CNN) - A Sichuan Airlines co-pilot was sucked halfway out of an aircraft's cockpit when its windshield shattered during a flight, Chinese state media has reported. Captain Liu Chuanjian and his

Velcro - what a rip-off!

"A doctor tells a woman she can no longer touch anything alcoholic. So she gets a divorce..." Did you like the One liner? Then Please Upvote and Comment

Gambling is illegal in Africa because there are too many cheetahs!

I thought too much about this first one liner - so I wrote that instead. Nonsense is more common sense than making sense. It Science. Science is the signs of the times. Logic is for the Path-O-Logical.

Step up your dad game with these knee slappers. Simply launch off a few of these babies to light up family barbecue night. What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? "Dam" What about the

When I was young my mom opened an AOL account just so we had spam to eat.

Source: My thoughts: I think this reaction is a little over the top. He's getting rather old. All packages look a little suspect at that age. Laughter is the best medicine. Resteem if this made you laugh

Fruit truck spills over, create's traffic jam People who are gluten free get a lot of hate, but I really respect them for going against the grain. I'm an archaeologist and my life is in ruins These were