I can't do that because......

I'm a reseller for a fairly well known Anti-Virus company and have a pretty decent portfolio of customers using a number of their products. Everything from your basic PC anti-virus to encryption and 2FA for VPN's. Fairly regular customers have to renew their subscription, and we use our Partner Portal to do this.


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The other day, our Admins emails went down for an hour or so which obviously meant it was pointless emailing them, so I phoned instead:

Me: "Can you renew XYZ, please?"

Admin: "I can't! I can't get on my emails."

Me: "You don't need your emails?"

Admin: "But how will I get the acknowledgement?"

Me: "It's not important you can still renew them."

Admin: "But I need the acknowledgement to confirm it's done!"

Me: "No you don't? It will tell you in the account. And anyway, you'll have the notification when your emails come back up."

They slopped off the line muttering under their breath. It reminded me of an incident a few years ago when our CRM became corrupted for a short while.

Telesales: "I can't make any calls if the CRM is offline."

Me: "Yes you can."

Telesales: "How? I can't look at anybody's records."

Me: "You don't need to."

I promptly placed on their desk an A4 pad, a pen and a telephone directory.

Me: "There you go."

Telesales: "But! But! How will I know if I've contacted them before or not?"

Me: "It doesn't matter and if you recognise anyone don't call them. It's how we used to do it in the good old days before computers."

They picked the phone up muttering under their breath.


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It never ceases to amaze me how people won't try to find a way around a problem they seem to see it as a "Get out jail Free" card, a reason to give up. Never let a problem get in your way. To use an old (cheesy) saying: "There's no such things as problems only opportunities." always try and think of a way of achieving your goal even if you have to take the long way round.


My actual name is Pete. Here is why I have the username dickturpin.


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