Today, we have the freedom to be who we want to be! It's not something I take for granted. I come from a lineage of matriarchs - strong, powerful and full of faith. But what was their idea of freedom?
I wish blockchain technology existed back then so that I could have an immutable record of their voices, their words, their sayings, their tales - their hugs? Sigh
Time is fleeting and as I get older (and some-what wiser) I can hear their voices in the simplest things I say and sometimes, how I respond to life's challenges.
Growing up, I was not free to be who I wanted to be - study what I wanted to study tech, it was always going to be tech - and say what I wanted to say. Don't get me wrong - I LOVED my childhood - but when I got to a certain age, the carefree me had to comply, be submissive and quell my excitement for the world.
I was, after all, a young girl heading into womanhood!
But what did that mean? I looked around me and what I saw I rebelled against. Why could I not run freely and choose my own path?
As long as you're under my roof, you will follow my rules!
In a room full of people, why did I feel so alone...
I yearned for something bigger and found solace in the library of literature. Minutes turned into hours into days, weeks and years passed by with the flip of each page!
What was my chosen path, my purpose, my destiny?
Who was I amidst the expectations and choices for me: what I was to wear, how loud I could speak, who I could interact with, whom I was to marry...
Was my life truly mine to choose... to live, to love?
Someone said that all you need is love. But are we taught to love? Is love subjective, objective or free. Is it a feeling or an action? Is it passive or a driving force? I wrestled with this well into my adult years. The picture I saw didn't match up to the image Hollywood portrayed.
The love I was introduced to was rooted in obedience - which was tied to respect. Growing up, that meant -- keep quiet, listen and obey, that's all. Do what you're told to do and one day you will teach this to your children --
Now you see, this is what I struggled with - EVERY. SINGLE. DAY!
I did not like to be told what to do - so I bent the rules.
I did not like to be quiet - so I laughed from the innermost recesses of my soul.
I did not like to (blindly) obey - so I asked questions, debated, challenged!
To me, love was freedom, and acceptance and tolerance and understanding and respect!
To me, love was a driving force attracting more love resulting in a tangible feeling of warmth radiating in an all-round smile and joy!
To me, love was the answer to every question I had.
I was love! I was the change that I wanted to see. I was the one who was going to show them that love wins - always!
I am love - and I am loved! The journey towards loving oneself is challenging! Now, I know that accepting love is as great as giving love.
Love has taught me to how say YES and NO - to situations, to circumstances, to challenges, to opportunities, to people and to myself! Love has opened doors for me that I could never have imagined was possible. Love is bending my rigid systems of belief and shaping my heart, my mind and soul in a direction that I have now surrendered to.
So this blog is about the journey, the adventure, the lessons that were and are to come. It's about stepping out of my comfort zone and in the midst of adversity embracing a new challenge disguised as an opportunity.
So here's to all us all - stepping out, (un)learning, sharing, growing our communities, caring and sprinkling random acts of kindness as we navigate this beautiful (brief) journey called life!
#freewriters #ladiesofhive #hive #informationwar #freecompliments #lovinghive
