怀念余光中先生,赐予我写诗的灵感

wilburm(52)
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刚看到 bring@bring 前辈写了一篇“怀念余光中先生”,打开文章发现还有《乡愁》英文版。读下来总感觉有点儿熟悉,果不其然,原来我之前也有写过类似一篇,算是诗歌吧。当时写的时候并不知道和余光中先生这篇《乡愁》有点儿相像,说模仿太过牵强,可能是我当时写那首诗的一个灵感来源。一直到今天看到英文版《乡愁》,才发觉是有那么几行一样。给自己脸上贴光了。

冯唐说,我心目中作家的三大神器是:睡袍,初恋,故乡。我个人感觉这些放诗歌里面,也不无是些很好的意向。我那首诗的主题多少也能跟故乡搭得上——亲人,只不过我把故乡的范围扩大到了故乡的人,或许二者本身就有包含关系。因为这是我写过的仅有的一首诗歌,所以我还一个字一个字地把它译成了英文,自我感觉有那么点儿意思。尽管纯粹是为了押韵。

很惭愧我对余光中先生并不了解,但这首《乡愁》小时候就学过,进而促成了我人生第一首诗。所以今天厚着脸皮再发一遍,算是怀念余光中先生,赐予我的灵感。

这首诗写给我的父亲,还有我的童年。

《渴望父亲的双手》

小时候
我总渴望你的双手
把我举过肩头

曾记否
小院弹起的皮球
是你唯一的问候

还有
床下那只小木箱
虽然早已盖不上
却好像 把爱给封藏



懂事后
我总渴望你的双手
能有一丝温柔

下雨天
熙熙攘攘的人群间
希望看见你的脸

放学后
牵起我的小手
撑起一把大伞
可你却 不曾出现



如今长大了
我也有了自己的双手
却不知道 该如何去拥有

那被封藏的爱
像是被永远 锁进了童年
在心底 若隐若现

我还是渴望
能有一双手
让这情感 泛滥
尽情 泛滥

以下是英文译文,纯粹为了押韵,可能存在语法错误。

Longing for My Father's Hands

When I was a kid
I was overwhelmed with
longing for my father's hands
To lift me upon his shoulders

Have you ever remembered the rubber balls
Bounced up and down in our yards
It was the only gift
That you bought for me ever

And under the bed
the small wooden box you made
had already lost its lid
As if your love had gone with it forever



When I was in schools
I was overwhelmed with
longing for my father's hands
To have a touch of tenderness

Till I can see your face
from the bustling crowds
In rainy days

Then you can hold my tiny hands
And open your big umbrella after class
But I had never seen your face
Even ever once



And now, I have grown up
Although I already have my own hands
I do not know how I come to own

As if the vanished love
was locked into my childhood
While hidden in the bottom of my heart
Looming and looming

Nevertheless
I'm still overwhelmed with
longing for a pair hands
To make my depressed emotion
Overflowing and overflowing

最后附上余光中先生的《乡愁》及英文译版。自我认为是有一点儿相像。

小时候,
乡愁是一枚小小的邮票,
我在这头,
母亲在那头。
长大后,
乡愁是一张窄窄的船票,
我在这头,
新娘在那头。
后来啊,
乡愁是一方矮矮的坟墓,
我在外头,
母亲在里头。
而现在,
乡愁是一湾浅浅的海峡,
我在这头,
大陆在那头。

英文译版

When I was young,
my homesickness was a small stamp,
I was here,
my mother was there.
After growing up,
my homesickness was a narrow ticket,
I was here,
my bride was there.
Later,
my homesickness was a little tomb,
I was outside,
my mother was inside.
And now,
my homesickness is a shallow strait,
I am here,
the mainland is there.

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