I very much prefer face-to-face interactions and I've indeed had experiences where virtual communication made things worse, instead of better, as envisioned. Just as you've pointed out, there's quite a number of benefits including being able to see the other party's (parties') demeanor, which in turn, I believe, informs responses or reactions.
Many a time, I find that I'm too nervous to text a superior, or call, but if I was physically present with them, I seldom find it difficult to approach them. I've also noticed that when it comes to physical interactions, I wing it. I say it as is, I speak my mind, without fear of repercussion, because, if I said something like, "I must disagree with you sir or ma" over text, it may not have the same effect as if I said it to the person's face, since, then I'd probably be wearing a faint smile, or a wide smile, or a shy bow, or have a mock frown, or whatever else would tell that I don't mean it in a disrespectful manner. If it were text though, I find myself typing and erasing, and retyping and judging, and eventually not sendinh it at all.
One time I had this disagreement with my older sister, who's quite sensitive, and is very big on reverence and tone. I got her two pairs of tights for winter and had them sent over. When she received them, she called and without an iota of gratitude, complained endlessly that they were too light. This was a favour, out of my own pockets. The sentences she made and her tone of voice where so mean I kept mute and after the call ended, I began sulking, refusing to talk to her or text back.
Eventually, she texted again, upset that I was sulking, so I told her how she made me feel. In the course of the conversation, she said I was rude and kept referring to a particular sentence which I do not recall at this moment. She said it was disrespectful, etc. So I called. When I did, I repeated the same sentence and explained that I didn't say it the way she read it. She probably read it in my meanest tone ever, whereas I was, or meant to be, as polite as I could be. She understood and we made up.
Yes, these were different kinds of virtual communication, but there was a difference as a result of our using our voices. Sometimes, voices too help where a physical interaction isn't feasible. I am indeed a person whose communication skills can pass for commendable and I very much prefer to communicate than just let things slide. Communication, is very important.
I've lost a very close and old friend to lack of communication. She did something to offend me, and even though I tried to be the bigger person and reach out, she was unwilling. Or seemed to be. She's the type to just pretend like nothing happened, without ever wanting to address things, and after a while, we'd just be cool again. I've tolerated it for many years now, but it's just not who I am. I like to talk about stuff, understand perspectives, and ease the tension, that way there'll be no grudges or vindictiveness or whatever, anytime in the future.
Oh well, compatibility is a real thing in every kind of relationship. People are usually not serious about friendships, are hardly intentional and take it very lightly. I think that's unhealthy. I think we can do better. I think we should do better, friendships are really as important as any other relationship, if not more.
馃槃 just like in the original post, it seems as though there's been an off-topic deviation. This isn't about friendship, or any kind of relationship, it's about the importance of effective communication and the type I'd rather have. I believe the sentences I've managed to string together, have answered the question.
What do you think? By the way, I hear people say they prefer texts to calls and complain so much if they're called, when the person could've just texted. Are you like that?
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Cheers!
If I didn't source it, I took the shot.
