Holotropic Breathwork, blog, and My Actifit Report Card: June 18 2019
I had a weird experience today. Drove up state near Columbia SC and tried doing something called Holotropic Breathwork. I was hoping to do some inner healing and practice giving up control and giving into my body and senses. I'm not sure it worked well. My mind is to in control to let go. I tried ar least. The breathwork is breathing in and out until you trip yourself into another world while world music plays loudly in the background. I went to no world. All I had is my thoughts. ... like always.
Anything I have ever tried does nothing but just is me interacting with my thoughts. Never outside myself. The people I did this with didnt understand much of what I said about my problems but I dont blame them. Though i was highly annoyed with there bullshit suggestions when they had no understanding of what i was goinh through and trying to do. It is why I dont like to speak to people. No one understands these kinds of problems and my world.
Im still very lonely and the only person in my life that I care about I must ask if she actually cares about me or if im nothing. I'm probably nothing. I drove home and took a walk.