Awhile back there was this woman who married the Eiffel Tower. Back then I thought it to be utterly ridiculous. Falling in love with an inanimate object sounds rather divorced from sanity. Object sexuality is, however, a real thing. Object sexuality refers to those individuals who develop deep emotional and/or romantic attachments to (and have relationships with) specific inanimate objects or structures.
After giving this some thought, I realized that Ms Eiffel may be saner than I am. She met the Eiffel Tower in 2004, they dated for three years and then got married. They have been happy ever since. That’s more than I can say about my past relationships.
People are rarely surprising and mostly disappointing. Some people don’t care for you when you are alone. They only care for you when they are alone. My toaster has never disappointed me, sitting on my kitchen counter, it’s looking quite appealing right now.
I’ve dated inanimate people, metaphorically speaking. Perhaps it’s time I turn my attention to appliances. Here we are. My toaster and I on our first date. I think we make quite the couple. Intimate and inanimate.