Have you ever gone bankrupt?
Lost your home?
Lost everything?

Well, that's my topic for today....Sort of.

Today's Hive Learners writing prompt is "Being Broke". I read the writing requirements and I think they either (a) are terrible or (b) are poorly worded. Here are the writing requirements:

We all have experienced being broke at one time or the other, yet there are some things that we just can't keep from ourselves. What is that thing that no matter how broke we are, we'll always go ahead to buy it? This does not include necessary bills we need to pay, just pleasure spendings that being broke can't keep us from.

Now I wouldn't normally put the writing requirements into my post but this time I just had to.

Why

Because its confusing to me!

The topic says its about being broke but then says "This does not include necessary bills we need to pay"

If I have the money I need to pay my bills then I certainly am not broke!

I know broke...very well.

One of the things that sort of annoys me is that when I say I'm Canadian while I'm abroad-- people always assume that I'm rich. When I mention that there are poor people in my country I often get an odd look. Something which means Your from CANADA a rich country. Everyone has money there.

Now that I'm writing about being broke I'm certain some readers aren't going to believe me when I say I know about broke.

Here are some situations I've known. I'll let you, the reader, decide if I am acquainted with being broke and having no cash.

Examples of broke

Collecting from the trash when I was a child for recycleables to sell.
Seeing my mother pray and cry at the table because she had nothing to feed us. (shortly after my 10th birthday if I remember correctly)
Having no place to call my own and no job when I graduated from University.
My father lost his job, his land, his vehicle and possessions in 1984. He was collecting recyclables from the side of the road to get enough cash for cigarettes.
My stepfather lost his job, his home, his vehicle and had to move in with my grandmother and sleep on her couch in 1994.
My mother didn't have a job and had to sleep on my sisters couch when my stepfather lost everything in 1994.
Most recently I had to evict my son's room mate to be homeless when he couldn't pay his rent for two months.

How I'll answer the question "What I won't give up when I'm broke"

Short Answer: Coca-Cola

Source: Pixabay

However, that really doesn't work because if I'm able to pay my food bill Coca-Cola goes into the food budget. The prompt says I can pay my bills.

Next Answer: My Cellular Phone
However, that doesn't really work either. It is paid for. If I was broke I wouldn't lose it --just my data. No worries there because there is free Wi-Fi around town (the gym, Mcdonalds, and the library come to mind).

Those answers are terrible. So at the risk of angering those people who made the topic I'm going to answer the question in a different way.

What I learned from my Dad

My Dad had a very large acreage in the early 1980's. He had a 640 acre ranch complete with horses and lots of other animals. Swimming pool. Field to ride the snowmobile on. Tractor to ride around. Space to shoot his guns (hit a bird once, couldn't fire a gun for years after that). It was AWESOME.

Source: Pixabay

Then the high interest rates of the 1980's came. 24% interest and he couldn't pay the loan. He lost everything. At least he lost all his PHYSICAL possessions. Well, almost everything. In Canada creditors can't take "essential living possessions" like clothing, medication, and work tools. Everything else though was gone.

He went from having everything to having nothing!

I wasn't living with him at the time (my Mom and Dad divorced many years before). However, he tells me how he was scrounging soda cans to sell for enough money to buy cigarettes. Getting by on social assistance. Asking for help from his parents/brothers.

But

While lost all his physical possessions he held onto his most important things. He kept his ingenuity, imagination, and resourcefulness. He figured out how to grow, process and roll his own cigarettes. He found a way to trade work for land and ended up with 130 acres of land. He used his friends and connections to find a good paying job to keep him going.

Within 10 years he had everything back.... and more money than he had previously

What I learned from my Step-Father

Now my stepfather was also a successful man working hard from the 1960's until the late 1980's. He had a rental property. He had a nice home for my mom and us. He had a good position in his company with respect and good pay. However, a change in upper management caused him to lose his job. He followed his dream to become a Real Estate Agent.

Unfortunately he was a terrible Real Estate Agent

Within four years of the career change he had used up all the money from the sale of the house and rental property. He had nothing left. Just like my father he lost everything. He was in an even worse position though...he didn't have friends who he could stay with when he lost his home. His parents had a couch he could sleep on but no room for my mom. My sister had a couch my mom could sleep on but no room for my father-in-law. He loved my mom but couldn't live with her because there was no money!

My Step-Father thought hard, gave up real-estate, and studied hard to become a bus driver.

Source: Pixabay

After 6 months of hard work and training he got a new job. Soon after that he had enough money to rent a home for himself and my mom to live in.

Just like my Dad, my Step-Father lost all his physical possessions. He didn't lose his most important things. He kept his hard work ethic, his love for my mom, and his promise that he would always do his best to provide for her!

What I've learned on my own journey

Having started with nothing, people may look at how I grew up and say it was terrible. I'd disagree. It certainly was tough. I wouldn't change it at all though. Growing up in the way that I did meant that I learned to be responsible from an early age. I learned that Nothing should be taken for granted and not to feel entitled to anything.

Most importantly the few friends I had I knew were true friends. If friends stick by you when you have nothing then they are usually pretty trustworthy. How could I ever give up good friends? I also learned a few other super important lessons.

My value is NOT in the possessions that I own
I learned to trust in God
I learned to be humble.

I learned that as a child and it was reinforced when I left University with no job and no place to stay. I had to rely on my friends so that I would have food to eat and a place to sleep! (Thanks Mike, Thanks Cam). I guess I should also thank the Canadian social welfare system that gave me a little money for the two months that I was unemployed after leaving University!

Whether it is good or bad I also learned from my father and step-father. I learned that more intelligent and hardworking men than myself could lose everything overnight. I saw it happen twice and my Grandmother always told me how hard it was in the 1930's. In that regard I learned the value of money and being wise/frugal very early.

I've used that wisdom to help me attain a small measure of financial freedom.

What I've learned from my Son's Room Mate

Back in February this year, one of my wife's co-workers was going through a terrible time.

He lost his father and uncle to COVID
His wife cheated on him with another man / got divorced.
His wife kicked him out of the house so we was homeless
His vehicle got repossessed so he had no transportation or place to stay
He lost his job due to mental illness caused by a breakdown from the situation.

I can pretty much say that he Lost everything

We gave him a place to stay and I tried very hard to give him financial and life advice on how he should continue on in order to get ahead.

However, while my family held onto positive traits like ingenuity, imagination, hard work, devotion, humility and a sense of self worth. He held onto things that kept him from getting ahead.

What did he hold onto?

First: He held onto his pride!

I mentioned that he should learn to walk places and save money on transportation. He was too proud to be seen walking

I mentioned that he should use the library for free internet so he wouldn't have to spend so much on his cellphone data. He was too proud to be seen in the public library

I suggested that he should seek psychiatric help to give him strength to deal with the trauma he had gone through. He was too proud to have any of his ex-coworkers see him going to a psychiatrist

Second: He held onto the past!

He kept looking at what he had: House, Vehicle, Wife, Money, Friends, and Status.

His main priority was to get it all back ASAP! He focused his energy on legal battles with his wife and for his fathers estate. He focused his money on getting a new cellphone, new car, and impressing his friends with dinner out or going to the casino.

I pleaded with him to focus on the future not the past. Focus on making himself strong mentally, physically, financially and spiritually. To give up the anger and hurt and move on with peace. I urged him to spend his money wisely so he could make himself stable and not buy foolish things.

Unfortunately I knew he wasn't going to make it when...

Source: Pixabay

He had to choose between hair dye to keep his hair black and food to eat.
... when he chose the hair dye instead of food I knew he was in trouble.
... he was so proud he would rather starve than let others see him with grey hair!