Over the next coming five weeks, I will have the busiest training schedule I have had since starting at the company I work for. On top of that and as I have said before, I have been trying to ramp my own business consultancy sessions up, which has been successful and it will be the busiest period in over a year, plus a client that I trained about 5 years ago gave me a call yesterday asking me to put an offer in for training at the company he moved to, which ended our sessions previously. Then of course, there is the crypto life which is pretty much another full-time job on top.
Not only this - my wife has a second interview for a job next week, while I am delivering one of the trainings, so her dad would drive her there.
All my plans are coming together nicely!
...Until someone at my daughter's daycare has been exposed to the Corona virus and we are now "quarantined" for the next two weeks.
I put it in quotes as unless we are showing symptoms, we are allowed to go out and do our daily lives to a large degree, but our daughter can't go back to daycare. This makes everything I mentioned above very challenging.
Of course, we don't have it as bad as some in the world, as I have a decent internet connection at home, space for some kind of an office and I will go to my work on the weekend and pick up some more screens and a dock so that I can deliver from home, but still, it isn't ideal.
We also started our next phase of renovation work this week, but it looks like we will have to put that on hold too, which is now going to make it difficult for us to meet the required deadlines for the completion, which up until a few hours ago, felt well within our reach. Things change quickly.
Yeah, we will. But I do get tired of managing.
The last five years have all been about managing life in order to survive and I think my wife and I have done a pretty good job of it considering. In some ways, we have not only survived, we have thrived and we have an awesome daughter out of it. One of the biggest challenges along the journey however has been money and that has continued to be an issue up until this day.
Though this year, I am hoping that the work of all the other years will compound together to provide a situation where we will never have to worry again. I know that it is a longshot in many respects and I know that a lot of people don't believe still, but I hope to prove them wrong.
Hope is important.
I think that when we feel hopeless, we slow down to the point of stagnation, as there is no longer the reason to even try. I sometimes wonder if I was put into the same kind of position where it was just me I had to consider and provide for, would I have pushed as hard?
I have always maintained that on Hive, the older folk are generally the ones who have the resilience to make it through the thicks and thins - and perhaps this also comes down to the older people often being parents too. Perhaps it is that regardless of conditions, a parent has a different perspective on the meaning and value of doing something, as they connect their activity to their family and most parents I know, will work harder for their kids than they would for themselves.
When it comes to children, every parent hopes for the best, even though that isn't the way things usually turn out. Yet, a parent always has enough hope to try and fight, even if the situation is all but guaranteed to fail.
In Finnish there is a term called "sisu" which loosely translates into "grit and determination", but it is about the digging deep when the tank already is on empty, to find the fuel to fight on, the last stand. It is actually quite a beautiful term and I think it is most relevant in terms of what a parent is willing to do for their children, whether it be work three jobs or die on the frontline fighting in a war to protect the country. These things might not seem comparable, but the reason that people put in the effort is to protect what they love.
People do a lot of things for a lot of reasons and I think that we all have to consider why we are doing what we do. I think it is those who have a strong sense of meaning behind their actions that are the ones best able to continue on through all kinds of conditions, as it allows for something outside of themselves to be a source of energy for internal motivation. I was blowing in the wind for much of my life, my family changed that.
So, yes, I will manage, we will manage and IT'S FINE.
The next few weeks will be challenging, but likely no more than we have faced before and with an expiry date. It is just another bump in the road that must be negotiated before things get easier. Things might not actually ever get easier, luck may never swing our way - but I act on the hope that it will and will work toward that end.
Keep moving.
What other option is there?
Taraz
[ Gen1: Hive ]
