Halfway through my workout tonight, the mother of one of Smallsteps' friend's whom we had dinner with a couple weeks ago, came up to me and started talking. We talked for about half an hour, which ruined my workout, but since she wanted to talk, we talked. As said, I am trying to be more social anyway. However, she was saying that our conversation a few weeks ago about "what she gets from scrolling" stuck with her and she has cutback her phone usage and started walking more with the dog, and is considering starting the gym full-time. Currently, she is on an invite from a friend for a week.
She was saying how she doesn't like to go to the gym and prefers to walk, and that it is better to do the things she enjoys and is more motivated for. Which I get, but I actually disagree. Because if we always have to be motivated to do things, we aren't going to do much of what we need to do because a lot of that stuff isn't motivating. Instead in my opinion, we should work out what we need to do, and then do it regardless of how we feel at the time. What we are probably likely to find though, is that doing these things and getting them out of the way regularly, we will actually feel better for it, so there is a pay-off for doing what we don't want to do.
When we only do what we are motivated to do though, we are predominantly going to focus on what brings us a reward now and quite quickly, which means that we are less likely to do the things we need, nor are we likely to invest into our future condition. If we want to be in a particular position in the future, we are going to have to do the work for it now. An d if we are unwilling, we will almost certainly find ourselves in circumstances we don't want to be in, whether it be physically, mentally, financially, socially, or emotionally.
Motivation is a hurdle.
It is not that it is bad to have motivation, but when we need motivation in order to do what we must, we are going to get ourselves into trouble, as most of our daily life activities are pretty bland, pretty boring, take effort, are repetitive and do not inspire us. But, they need to be done, because if they aren't, our daily lives start to fall apart. When the many maintenance needs aren't taken care of, we start to degrade and put ourselves under unnecessary pressures that ultimately leave us less motivated and with a growing amount of stuff do do.
Just act.
We should stop waiting to be motivated or for having the perfect conditions or answers, and instead just start doing what we need to do, even if we are starting small. This way, we can gain experience, start building habits and adjust our activities based on knowledge. If we don't, we degrade.
So much of our lives are sedentary, which means we don't move enough, so we have to engineer our behaviours so we get the right range and amount of movement for our bodies to strengthen, repair, and maintain as we age. But our "sedentary lifestyle" isn't just not moving from in front of the screen, because we are also not "moving" enough mentally or socially, and our emotional movement is reactive, rather about strengthening our ability to deal with a range of circumstances. And this is because most of the decisions we make are out of convenience and ease, avoiding the work that we are unmotivated to do anyway.
Kill the need for motivation.
We should take our condition seriously enough that we are able to act even when we don't feel like it. That we can deal with changing conditions, even if we are disrupted. And that we can carry on and do what we must, despite the complete lack of motivation to do so. It sounds terrible, but it isn't that bad. I know, because I have had almost zero motivation for five years since I had a stroke. My brain just doesn't tell me I want to do much now, even though I know I have things to do.
If I can do it, most others can.
Because I am far from special. Most people are more capable, more skilled, and more intelligent than me, but the only thing that keeps me in the game, is that I am more consistent than most, because I don't need to be motivated to act.
"I don't want to do it, so I won't!"
Seems pretty childish for the things an adult must or even should.
Taraz
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