'I can remember the first, terrifying feeling. It... hurt. My body was changing and I didn't know why. I didn't understand the changes and all I knew was that I could not control the pain I felt. I could no longer breathe and found myself struggling for air. I had to fight for each gulp of air. Then it was dark and I had nothing. No heartbeat, no lungs, no body. I just was. I have no idea how long I have existed like this, floating mindlessly through time, but it was long enough to get used to it. I didn't feel anymore. I wasn't even sure if I existed. Or was I dead?
What was this place? A void? Was I in the afterlife? Or perhaps I didn't exist at all? I mean, I couldn't even feel anything... This place was so dull.
These were the thoughts that were running through my 'head'. I had no memories, thoughts or feelings and the only way for me to think was to ponder if I even existed or not. And if I did exist, was there any way I could feel again? I don't know how long I have been there, not even sure if my mind could really be called a 'mind'. After all, I couldn't even decide whether I wanted to think or not!
Then I felt it. Something was surrounding me. I could feel something beyond me, in front of me and on both sides. It reminds me of skin with all its pores. I was hit with a feeling of pure mortal dread. So this was death! There was nothingness, something beyond the blackness of my mind and there was the sensation of what had to be a somethingness. I guess I would have to get used to it, once I figure out how to 'be' again.
I could hear it, the sound of something speaking. It was unlike anything else I had ever heard. It was practically screaming to me, calling my name as my consciousness. But I wasn't even sure I existed. So... who was calling me?
Then I noticed. I saw things. I could see things from all around me and from behind me too. I didn't know what they were and they were all different. They would occasionally move and I almost 'saw' the differences between the different things. It was a very strange curiosity and I was amazed. But I had forgotten my curiosity. It was the only thing I felt, besides pain, that had touched me before.
As the things moved, I saw that they were faint, barely touched by the blackness. I figured a way to see them better. The 'pain' was not too bad now. Then the things started to move more, I saw they were getting closer. What was happening? I'm sure I didn't know, so I was completely confused. I was in the middle of everything, but I could not feel them. What could of moved so fast? What could have been so nearby and so I hadn't felt it?
I was in the middle of a large room, surrounded by these things and I was moving too. The room was very big and I had a view all around. I felt something was very close and I was getting closer to sure what it was. Then I saw it, everything was slowing down. The pain was not bad anymore. I could even think again, this was more like what I had been expecting.
Then the pain was gone. I realized, I didn't feel anything again. I was in this void, what was it? It was like nothing I had ever known, but as I looked around, I could see other things. I could see through them, but I hadn't wanted to look before.
This stuff seemed alive, weak, but alive. I thought it was quite something. But I still could not feel anything. I could see far below me but I couldn't fly, no matter how hard I tried. This was very frustrating. I knew what I wanted to do! I wanted to go there! I wanted to feel this world, but I couldn't do that. What was I doing? I saw that I was flying very slowly, but I was walking around, just like the things below. I had to give it a try, I mean, if I couldn't fly, I needed to feel something else.
I could fly in this... void? I don't know how I did it, but suddenly I was flying! Ah, but not alone. I realized that everything else was following me. That's right, they are following me forever, as I am flying, they follow in track. So I just walked around a little bit. I saw the things doing different things around me, moving around and slowly building things. I was shocked! I mean, I know what "the things" did (they were making things). How know this?
Oh, I know, I saw the things below me started making a structure from nothing. They build it from the ground up, starting with the walls, roof and roof and the roof of the roof. They built a house. They built with metal, I'm sure it was very good stuff! I could feel the metal. It touched me, making me feel good.
Oh, it's so good. I could build this, focus on this. I could feel my hands, I could see my smile. I was feeling again, but why was I smiling? If I had to guess, I would say I was happy, and that was a good thing. I am happy, I think. I felt so good and I couldn't stop feeling so good.
