What do YOU do when you're feeling "stuck" in life?

Time to get a little personal here... This has been building for a while and I feel like I'm on the brink of big changes. Not sure what they are. Not sure how to start the snowball a'rolling. Maybe you can help? I'd be grateful to hear perspectives from you Steemians, especially coming from other countries, cultures, and ages.

Let's Start with the Good...

I'm not totally dissatisfied with everything in my life. I'm grateful for my...

Romantic Relationship

I've been with @shenanigator for 16 months now, and he makes me incredibly happy. We make each other laugh and push each other to try/learn new things. Somehow, he even balances the empath in me, which is a rare and incredible thing. We live together in a beautiful condo that we shouldn't be able to afford. It's within walking distance to our favorite restaurants and cocktail spots, plus a mere 15-minute drive to my work—a straight shot down 7th Street.

Family

I am also blessed to have an unconditionally loving family, most of whom live right here in Arizona. (I do miss my sis, though. She's in DC for grad school.) No matter what happens, I know they'd be there for me.

Steady Job

Lastly, I am fortunate enough to have a steady paycheck from my full-time job. It's a "9 to 5" type where I'm able to work the most flexible hours you can imagine. If I'd rather do 8-4 or 10-6, that's fine. If I need to take half a day off for an appointment, I can just spread the hours throughout the rest of the week. AND, every Tuesday and Thursday are work from home days. They also give unlimited* PTO (paid time off), which is one of the best perks.

Though they boast "unlimited," it's not really unlimited—they give you two weeks each year and start raising eyebrows if you want more than that.

As you can see, I have many things to be thankful for. I try my best to focus on the good instead of the bad, but there are some areas of pretty significant discontentment which have been leaving my heart bothered for quite a while now.

Now, the More Unsettling Things

There are two, maybe three, main factors that cause me to wrinkle my brow every day...dozens of times each day.

My Health

I've been dealing with steadily deteriorating health for about two years now. This is after I recovered from Adrenal Fatigue Syndrome (AFS).

During the time that I was dealing with AFS, I discovered food allergies/intolerances to gluten, animal products, peanuts, and soy. Since then, I've also become allergic to onions, peas, and sesame seeds, then (more recently) high-nickel foods—that's the longest list of all of them. You can read more about that in this post.

Right now, I'm eating about a dozen low-nickel foods. If I stray from those, I face the most extreme eczema on my hands you can possibly imagine. (Refer to my Systemic Nickel Allergy Syndrome post to see pics at your own risk.) It will eventually look like I have a flesh-eating disease...gross, I know. And painful af. :( Thankfully, I've started the healing process via the guidance of a naturopathic doctor.

I'm sure it's pretty obvious why this is a "pain point" in my life right now. Eating the same damn meal, three times a damn day... Never getting to go out to eat... Constantly dealing with reactions to food... (Did I mention it also appears as cystic acne on my face? Looks like I'm a fucking hormonal teenager, ugh.) You get the point.

It also makes me feel like being in the U.S. with all the fucked up GMO foods, artificial ingredients everywhere you turn, bleached & fluoride-infused water, stressful/demanding day-to-day lifestyle, and well, everyone in the world knows the political situation—not getting into that though—it's just not a good place for my body to ever recover from these issues.

Case in point: when I was in Amsterdam for SteemFest, I ate a pineapple curry that should have had no onions (since I'm allergic), but it did. I didn't have a trace of an allergic reaction...making me wonder if I'm really allergic to these foods, or if the ones in the US are just genetically modified and Roundup-infected to the point that they're wrecking my body. Note: I do eat 90% organic.

My Job

Disclaimer: To any coworkers that may be reading this—it's not a resignation letter lol. I've worked at my job for over two years now. I'd say for the most part it's always been 70-80% good and 20-30% undesirable. And before you start with the "Oh you Millennials these days..." nonsense, I FULLY understand that I'm not always going to like 100% of my job. I'm fine with being less than happy with 20-30% of it. That's life. For the last eight months (probably more), however, it's been more like 40-50% happy and 50-60% unhappy. The scale has tipped in the wrong direction.

As a Content Strategist, I'd like to be doing client-facing work where I help with brand voice, website/app content, blog articles, overarching brand strategy, experiments/testing, etc. What they have me doing is bullshit SEO content—basically mini research reports (300-400 words) with specific keywords plugged in. No one will read these pieces of content, they're for Google's eyes only. The way I put it, they're whoring my content out to Google to give our clients more domain authority. It's a huge waste of my time and skills. I've voiced my concern and dissatisfaction, yet it's still a big chunk of my working hours each week.

In general, I feel underutilized and undervalued. I'm also not growing as a Content Strategist/ UX Writer since I'm the only one at this company who does what I do—there's no one to learn from. Each day, I come home feeling mentally and emotionally drained, which means instead of having the energy to do the hobbies/activities I love, I resort to watching TV to give my brain/body relief.

Each week that passes, I wonder if the steady paychecks and flexibility are worth it. It feels like I'm wasting my life away, especially since I hardly have the energy and enthusiasm to do things outside of work during the week. Do I get a new job at a different company? Do I do something different entirely? (Like <a href="https://steemit.com/food/@sharingeverybite/guess-what-motherfuckers-it-s-about-to-get-spicy-in-this-bitch"the spice business @shenanigator and I are trying to start.) It's hard for me to imagine leaving a steady salary that not only helps me pay for rent, food, medical expenses, etc., but it also gives a lot of flexibility to travel a bit. I go back and forth on this daily.

My Location

But, wait! Didn't you just say you love your condo and its location? Ah, yes. I definitely love this spot in Phoenix and if I'm still living here, I'd happily stay in this exact condo for as long as our landlord keeps renting it to us. That being said, I haven't felt like Phoenix, Arizona was the right place for me to be on this Earth for a long time now.

Since I was 13, I wanted to move to Portland, Oregon. If I were to do that, my job would dock my pay $10,000 as a "nomad-ing fee" to work remotely. That's about a 25% pay cut—ouch. But let's say I quit my job... should I even move to Portland? Even that I don't know. I'm not so sure the United States is where I should be right now.

Decisions, decisions...

This is where I'm at right now. Troubled. On a bit of an emotional teeter-totter. The best thing I can think of at the moment is to start daily meditation again...shouldn't have stopped my practice in the first place.

What are your thoughts? Experiences? Insights?