A lot of people think that leadership is just associated with titles, position, authority, and the quest to make people to follow you. No wonder many people strive to become leaders in their organisation, work place, community, even in their family. However, what they fail to understand is that leadership does not start with managing others, but it actually starts with managing yourself. Before you will be able to guide others, you must first be able to guide your own self. After all, it is from what you have that you can give to others.
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Leading yourself talks about the ability to control your actions, to discipline your habits, and also to direct yourself towards a clear goal in life. It also means taking responsibilities, not just for yourself, but for your actions, and refusing to blame others or circumstances for your failures. Someone who cannot manage time effectively, who cannot manage emotions, circumstances, and situations, how will they claim to be able to manage other people? If you want to lead others, then it is of utmost importance that you first lead yourself. People will not follow someone who is obviously not going anywhere. You have to have a purpose first, and going somewhere, before others can follow you.
In order to lead yourself well, there are some things you need to have handy with. The first one is self-awareness. You have to first understand your strengths, limitations, values, and even goals. It is when you are aware of what drives you and where you need improvement, that you will be able to make good and intentional decisions about your life and your growth. When you are self-aware, you will not be easily distracted, because you understand your priorities. I often tell people that if you do not know where you are going to, then you can easily be distracted, and you may end up in another place. You have to know your purpose, so you can easily align with it.
The second quality you need to have handy in order to lead yourself is discipline. Leadership requires consistency, but consistency will demand discipline from you. This can include activities like waking up early to work on your goals, keeping promises, meeting deadlines, working on tasks even when you do not feel like, maintaining your integrity, etc. All these require integrity to function. This is not necessarily what you do when people are watching you, but even when they are not watching. When you build self-discipline, then you will become qualified for leadership. Trust me, discipline makes people to trust you, and this is also the foundation of leadership. You will agree with me that you are more likely to follow the person you trust.
The third point is to learn to control your emotions. As a leader, you will face criticism, opposition, pressure, and a lot of challenges. If you cannot control your emotions, you may react in an impulsive way, and you may damage a relationship that you have built for long. Learn to take a pause, reflect on how you want to respond, and then respond with wisdom, instead of just reacting in a spontaneous and volatile way. It is a show of maturity when you can control your emotions. When you are calm and you can control your emotions, you will naturally inspire confidence in others. This is leadership.
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Leading yourself also involves setting personal standards. You do not have to wait until someone pushes you first before you act. You have to set your own personal goals and standards. To do this, you have to learn to create routines that support your growth, evaluate your activities and the outcome, hold yourself accountable, and take responsibilities even when no one is watching you. What you are doing is that you are not just assuming a leadership position to become a voice to dish out commands and instructions, but you are becoming a worthy example for others to follow.
It is worthy to note that when you lead yourself well, others will follow you naturally. People are naturally inspired by discipline, consistency, and integrity. So when you have these qualities, people will be drawn to you. Trust me, people observe you, your habits, and your personality even when you are not aware. So they will decide if you are worthy to be followed or not. You do not command people to follow you, you earn it.
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