There’s an allure around the concept of “bouncing back….”
Especially in motivational & personal development circles/culture, the idea of ‘persisting through setbacks’ and blazing ahead ‘stronger than ever’ after life’s obstacles holds an almost-dogmatic valuation as some ultimate premise from which to live, the failure to fulfill upon equating to some all-encompassing failure to oneself.
Yet, it doesn’t fit all so well into the cultural rhetoric that there may be times and places where/when the approach/outlook/mindset is ill-fitted to the realities of a person’s individuated situation.
As romanticized as the whole notion of “bouncing back” may seem on the surface, it fails to account for a plethora of possibilities in which it is not at all appropriate.
For all the “life coaches” and self-help gurus pushing such superficial one-size-fits-all strategies, there are surely millions of people who’ve gone through situations that have knocked them so hard on their asses, they can’t even get up to fucking crawl, let alone pull off some superhero-esque comeback that’d make the dudes charging $5000 per weekend seminar “proud” (for their belief system having been validated.)
Sometimes life dishes trials akin to a nuclear blast, from which we’re fucking lucky to even be alive. Sometimes we fall so hard from so high, nearly every bone in our body gets broken.
Sometimes the closest thing to “bouncing back” possible is a rehabilitation that takes a fucking decade until we can even function reasonably “normally” - and to even attempt anything resembling a “bounce back” would be absolutely catastrophic, trying to rush a highly delicate healing process.
And perhaps sometimes, we wouldn’t even want to “bounce back.”
To what… the same old self whose recklessness ended up in a destructive mess - not only of/for ourselves, but those around us?
For what… the ego-gratification of having “proven” our capacity to embody a superiority complex above the petty vulnerabilities of the human condition?
Perhaps there are situations where aiming to “bounce back” is the stupidest thing one could do - versus rebuilding one’s foundation from scratch, stronger than ever, to support a slow, sustainable growth that renders us immune to the susceptibilities & errors at play the first times we fell.
Perhaps there’s some maturity and wisdom in integrating the lessons at the bottom of our valleys, completely reassessing and recalibrating everything, and setting a totally different trajectory than continuing the same shit “back” on the old path.
Of course, to each their own.
“Pride cometh before the fall…” and surely, some may feel inclined to “bounce back” after the fall - merely setting themselves up for yet another fall, redirecting their pride to a “comeback” rather than find humility in the decent, from which to set an entirely different pace more akin to a tortoise than unstable two year-old bouncing off the walls.
And certainly, there are some setbacks of a less-serious degree where a bounce back may be effective - not only in returning to one’s previous level, but harnessing the force of the movements to reach even higher.
And of course, maybe that’s where the wisdom comes in being able to discern the difference.
To refine our sensitivities to a complex myriad of unseen factors determining what strategies are and are not appropriate at our given point(s) on our individual paths.
To exercise restraint where/when appropriate - acting in accordance with what we actually need rather than anyone else’s dogmatic belief system. To be compassionate with ourselves when we’ve been knocked down so fucking hard, attempting to downplay the severity of our wounds and “bounce back” would be straight-up abuse.
Or… blah, blah, blah.
Maybe I’m just rationalizing my own procrastination and victimization, rather than taking some idealized consistent action that fits the mold of motivational elitism. Or maybe I’m finally growing up and slowing down enough to learn from the error of my previous self’s rushed ways. Or maybe it’s a bit of both - plus a whole spectrum of other distinctions in between, all existing simultaneously in wave form, each waiting to be collapsed into particle form with a focus of attention and its speaking into existence.
Or some shit.