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“Katherine” “Katherine!” a mother called out to her wobbly, gleefully running toddler at a small gathering i was at recently. The tiny child grinned with pure, in-the-moment joy, running faster, her hair like sunshine cotton candy, it all piled atop her head forming one gravity defying bouncing curl. “Katherine!” My eyes widen, my ears ring with the name. The same name i was given, the one on my ID, the one i must sign as my signature. “Come here!” The mother is walking quickly now to the child, accelerating in my direction. My heart beats faster, throat clenches a bit, I have butterflies in my stomach.The flustered woman passes me, mostly unaware of my even standing there.
My soul does not respond to the name, my body physically rejects it. I feel drained after having to sign it on legal paperwork, especially when i must repeat it over and over. It feels like i’m lying, like i am writing a fake name. I avoid saying it aloud, it sounds strange in my voice. When i hear the name I feel like a child being yelled at.
Later I got to talking to the mother. She asked my name. “Oaken” i replied.
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