Hello everyone and welcome to my post.
The fun some of us had last holiday was really an unforgettable one. We really enjoyed ourselves while some of us did not.
Last holiday came with many lessons which has shaped me into becoming somebody new this new year. The memories i have are still intact and I am gradually being the person I always want to be.
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My holiday was not as fun filled as you think it is. though I and one of my hive friends went out for site seeing, my holiday was not as fun as an average youths birthday is supposed to be.
I didn't my holidays reading so through. Most of the times, it feels like I am in solitary confinement because of how lonely everywhere was.
I was alone with just my books and my phone which helped me with my studies and kept me entertained. Once in a while, I do go out for a walk so that I'll maintain my sanity. During these days, it was as if I am losing my humanity because I was not able to communicate with people properly without seeing them somehow.
WHAT IMPACTED ME DURING THE HOLIDAYS
The thing that left an impact in me did these two weeks of celebration was being alone.
Being alone is really hard, but just hard, it teaches a lot of lessons.
After about 3 days of being so by my self, I didn't call no body, did not text no body, it was just me through out me. That was when I realized my importance. I actually don't use to appreciate myself for things, and I also feel I could do better, based on this, I don't actually see my importance until I accomplish something first. After the day 3 of being alone, different thoughts started popping up my head. I started recalling things I did perfectly, I remembered the things that I was best in but it did not give my self credit for, i saw how strong i am from all the memories, i saw how i allowed a girl play me and tag it as love, i thought of many things and i realized that i am truly awesome.
After the first week of being alone, I started replaying different events that has happened in my life. I don't know, but I think this is my minds way of coping with the boredom and it really helped.
My mind replayed every single thing that has happened. It was almost like my life was flashing before my eyes but at a slower pace.
I seized the opportunity and started studying every single memory. It was like my mind was going from one event to the other, so what I did was to analyze the first event, correct myself, find better solutions (if I messed up when that thing happened) to be able to properly handle such things in case it happens in the future.
I was a kind of scared because after a week and some days, it felt like I wss begining to hallucinate. I had to go for a walk before I run mad or something.
When I came back from the walk, I noticed that I was not into people as much. Subconsciously, I was ignoring people and was wanting to stay alone and enjoy my company. I was not able to properly communicate fluently with people as I was always wanting to run away from conversations.
After the analysis, I decided to get some rest after eating.
HOW THESE EVENTS IMPACTED ME?
All these things I explained above affected me in many ways. Currently, before I say anything, I always think very well,more than I usually do.
It made me believe that I can accomplish anything alone without the need of involving anybody
It made me understand the importance of analyzing of your day went, and looking for better ways to improve the quality of your speech and actions
This loneliness made me understand perfectly that I came to earth alone, I have to make it alone, and go back to my creator alone. However, there is need to help those weaker than I am.
It also gave me a connection with my subconscious. What I really need to learn now is how to control my subconscious mind.
Being alone, opened my eyes to many things. Things was ignorant to, things I felt were not worth my time but was affecting me. My mind was open to those things and I understood the importance not underestimating anything or anyone.
I also learnt to appreciate myself more when I accomplish little task. Though I use to believe that there is no celebration until the ultimate task is cleared, being a lone has opened my mind to the fact that there is no ultimate task if you are not motivated to accomplish it.
That will be all for this post. I appreciate your presence here and I hope to see you next time.
Thank you for reading ☺️
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