My motivation is all over the place at the moment. Seems like all I want to do is get out there and create, but the world insists on keeping me stuck inside or wasting time elsewhere. From business card orders getting misprinted and needing to be fixed, taking additional days, to something as simple as attempting to collect something from the post office but a power cut made it a useless attempt that required visiting the following day. Not to forget potential clients just taking forever to respond, to the point where I've just said to them that if they really want me, I'm going to increase my fee. It feels as if everyone around me is displaying astronomical levels of incompetence to the point where it is constantly impacting my free time and setting me back more and more. I don't want this to turn into a rant post but it's a big reason as to why I haven't been doing the one thing I love the most: running around with a camera.
These were all taken within an hour today. A walk to the post office to attempt to collect what I needed again. Followed by the collection of my reprinted business cards that I have been trying to get made for well over a week now. I took a few longer routes just because I had missed walking so much. I craved it. I missed the (somewhat) fresh air. I had missed the little details of the streets and the natural glow of the light that fills them. I had missed seeing the little moments of life around me with all the interactions people had. I missed thinking as an artist as I walked, longing to create more and capturing things in various ways, thinking so far ahead at how things could be done or edited down the line. I had missed that feeling of motivation and excitement coursing through me as I notice potential compositions and how I could shoot them another time with different focal lengths.
Roaming the streets like this is almost like a perpetual state of location scouting. Constantly imagining how something could be shot here, how I'd do it and what sort of story could be told. This is quite useful to me given I have the intent of shooting various things throughout the city with people down the line. I just need to get a bit of time to find the right people. To really advertise and network. This side of things excites me a bit, to finally start pushing towards the things I've slowly been building for the past near four to five months. While I feel like to some degree I'm entering my villain arc with the lack of patience I have for people, I still want to get out there and interact with them and find people to be creative with. The more time I spend at home, the more I find that I just can't stay still, the creativity constantly on my mind.
On just this short one hour walk I felt the want to continue. To shoot as much as I could, to keep exploring. But the sun was already starting to set. The light already starting to fall behind the buildings and various areas of elevation around. There wasn't much point, especially with my backpack now full of items I needed to take home. And even so, I felt that excitement to return and look at the things I had captured, to go through it all. I think tomorrow I'll take a few of those business cards and scatter them around a few places that capture my interest. The few shops I think could need the push. Finding different people and perhaps other creatives and little businesses that could do with some collaboration. I'm enjoying the colder days too, where the sunlight is still beautiful albeit short, where I can actually walk around without that intense sun being a danger to health.
I'm also having a ton of fun with Davinci Resolve, trying new things and learning more about the editing side, which I think I had been putting off for a long time. I think I prefer editing in this compared to the usual programs. The features of a video editor seem stronger than something like Capture One. For example adding some halation to an image makes a big difference, and the types of film grain available make the images more unique compared to the default photo editor ones! Much more fun.
