I tell him I love him.
He ignores what I say.
Why does it hurt so much that I want him to stay.
I’ve been emotional lately no one can tell.
It hurts me how much I fell.
Fell in a hole of depression.
People say that’s a step knowing you’re depressed.
Maybe it’s because I’m well dressed all the time and covered in makeup.
It hides my insecurities.
When I always need security in the relationship.
I know this is all a process I’ll become a confident woman.
I won’t pressure it though I know my life will be better.
It will get better. It is better.
I hope he stays with me and if he doesn’t it’s okay I’m glad I met him.
But fuck I know it sounds so bad but I don’t want him to leave.
He’s not my property though.
I want him to know how much I love him.
Despite the restraining order I’ll always want him.
In the year 2020 it might be the year where no one annoys us and we can finally buy beer.
We’re not alcoholics.
He didn’t mean what he did. And neither did I.
He loves me.
Besides he was next to me in the hospital bed.
I don’t care what they say for no one knows him like I do.
It’s not about the sex Jesus I know that’s what people do.
It’s about the love and the way he treats me.
So shut up people he didn’t fucking beat me.
I love him and I want him to know I’ll wait for him.
There’s no one else.
Just him.
