Daddy!!! Daddy, look! Come and see!!!
The Little Lady sounded frantic as if the WiFi had dropped out in the middle of a movie on Netflix.
Hang on, lass. I'm coming up!
Alas, I was not coming up as in to get this party started. Nor were we settled on on the sofa watching rubbish movies and eating popcorn.
No, I was scrambling up a hill in the deep dark depths of a thickly wooded little forest near my house.
As we are technically only allowed out once a day for exercise we have been quite lucky in that we live right next door to a forest.
It's quite the atmospheric place and has been great for the kids to romp about in during our allotted exercise hour.
At least until now.
What is it? Are you ok?
Finally, I hauled my way to the crest of the hill that the Little Lady was standing at.
She was pointing to the base of a tree and smiling.
Look, Daddy, isn't that amazing?
She exclaimed in delight.
My eyes followed her pointing finger.
I recoiled in horror.
What in the name of all that is flaming and fuckity!?
What was this twisted and obscene anathema that stung at my eyes???
A house? A miniature house? Tucked into the base of a tree!?
I reeled back and spun in a panic.
Not just one!?
They were everywhere!?!
Stay back, little one. There is danger here!!
I barked, my voice shrill with terror.
Don't be silly, Daddy. They're just fairy houses!
She yelled, running from one tree to the next in excitement.
Fairies. Of course! The blasted ancient enemies of man. It looks like they had pierced the veil and were setting up an outpost only a short hop from where I lived.
I tried to swallow but my mouth was bone dry as if there was too much tonic in my figurative gin.
We had to get out of here. Before they took us.
I grabbed my daughter's hand.
Quickly lass. The hour is almost up. We must be away.
I lied so as not to alarm her at the thought of an ancient and evil incursion into the lands of man.
As we raced through the woods we saw their sign. Brazen beyond imagining.
At the treeline that marked the boundary of the woods we almost stumbled into a sentry, sent there by the wicked fairies of the woods themselves. No doubt to slaughter and harvest the souls of the innocent.
I pulled the Little Lady down and around the archaic dread guardian and at last we burst into the safety of the open fields.
At least, we were safe... for now.
