饾櫥饾殬饾殰 饾櫠茅饾殫饾殠饾殯饾殬饾殰 饾殺 饾殠饾殨 饾櫜饾殜饾殯谩饾殞饾殱饾殠饾殯 (饾櫞饾殏饾櫩/饾櫞饾櫧饾櫠)
Hace unos d铆as vi algo en redes sociales que dec铆a algo as铆: "los hombres pueden estar despiertos hasta las dos de la ma帽ana, levantarse a las seis, estar endeudados, solos, agotados, con el coraz贸n roto, y a煤n as铆 al d铆a siguiente seguir intentando, trabajando, creyendo que todo va a salir bien. Eso no es suerte, que eso es ser un hombre de car谩cter".
Y lo escuch茅 y pens茅: bueno, s铆, eso existe. Hay hombres que viven as铆, que cargan con todo eso y siguen adelante. Pero no pude evitar hacerme una pregunta. Una bastante simple. 驴Y las mujeres? 驴Acaso las mujeres no tienen car谩cter?
No lo digo con 谩nimo de confrontar. Entiendo lo que esa frase intenta decir. Quiere poner en valor una forma de resistencia masculina que muchas veces pasa desapercibida, que no se celebra, que no recibe reconocimiento. Los hombres tambi茅n sufren en silencio. Lo s茅. Tambi茅n est谩n solos. Me consta Tambi茅n se rompen por dentro y tienen que disimularlo. Sin dudas. Eso es cierto y merece ser dicho.
Me acord茅 de mi vecina. Cr铆a sola a dos ni帽os. Trabaja limpiando casas. Nunca la he visto faltar un solo d铆a, aunque s茅 que hay meses que llega justa, que los ni帽os se ponen malos y ella no tiene con qui茅n dejarlos, que a veces llora en el descansillo cuando cree que nadie la ve. Y a煤n as铆, cada ma帽ana, ah铆 est谩.
Una amiga pas贸 una depresi贸n muy grande despu茅s de un aborto. De esas que no te dejan salir de la cama. Pero ella se levantaba cada d铆a. Preparaba el desayuno a sus hijos. Los llevaba al colegio. Sonre铆a a las madres en la puerta. Llegaba a casa y se sentaba en el suelo de la cocina a llorar un rato, hasta que era hora de ir a buscarlos. Y al d铆a siguiente, otra vez.
Ellas tambi茅n se han desvelado hasta las dos. Tambi茅n se han levantado a las seis. Tambi茅n han estado endeudadas, solas, agotadas. Tambi茅n han tenido el coraz贸n roto. Y al d铆a siguiente han seguido trabajando, intentando, creyendo que todo iba a salir bien. 驴A eso qu茅 le llamamos? 驴Suerte? No lo creo.
Entonces pienso: 驴por qu茅 cuando hablamos de esta resistencia necesitamos ponerle etiqueta de g茅nero? 驴Por qu茅 nos cuesta tanto decir simplemente que hay personas que aguantan cosas muy dif铆ciles y siguen adelante? Parece que para valorar lo que unos viven, a veces sentimos que tenemos que nombrarlo como algo exclusivo. Como si reconocer el sufrimiento ajeno nos quitara espacio al nuestro.
Pero no es as铆. La vida es dura para casi todos. Hombres y mujeres pasan noches sin dormir. Hombres y mujeres se sienten solos, endeudados, rotos. Y hombres y mujeres, la inmensa mayor铆a, al d铆a siguiente se levantan y siguen. No porque sean de un g茅nero u otro. Sino porque no hay m谩s remedio. Porque hay gente que depende de ellos. Porque creen, o necesitan creer, que ma帽ana puede ser mejor.
A veces creo que el problema es que hablamos de estas cosas como si la fortaleza fuera un recurso limitado. Como si hubiera que repartirla y unos tuvieran m谩s derecho a ella que otros. Pero no funciona as铆. El car谩cter no es patrimonio de nadie. No viene en el ADN. Se construye, se entrena, se sufre. Y lo construyen millones de personas cada d铆a, de todas las edades, de todas las condiciones, de todos los g茅neros.
La frase que escuch茅 no est谩 mal. Describe una realidad. Pero se queda corta. Porque esa misma realidad la viven ellas. La vivimos todos. Y quiz谩s lo que necesitamos no es encontrar qui茅n la vive m谩s o qui茅n la merece m谩s. Sino simplemente reconocer que levantarse cada d铆a y seguir, a pesar de todo, es lo m谩s humano que hay.
漏 Contenido Original en espa帽ol traducci贸n al ingl茅s en Google Translation
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饾櫠饾殠饾殫饾殯饾殠饾殰 饾殜饾殫饾殟 饾櫜饾殤饾殜饾殯饾殜饾殞饾殱饾殠饾殯 (饾櫞饾殏饾櫩/饾櫞饾櫧饾櫠)
A few days ago I saw something on social media that said something like this: "Men can stay up until two in the morning, get up at six, be in debt, alone, exhausted, heartbroken, and still the next day keep trying, working, believing that everything will be alright. That's not luck, that's being a man of "Character."
And I heard it and thought: well, yes, that exists. There are men who live like that, who carry all that weight and keep going. But I couldn't help but ask myself a question. A rather simple one. What about women? Don't women have character?
I don't say this to be confrontational. I understand what that phrase is trying to say. It aims to highlight a form of male resilience that often goes unnoticed, that isn't celebrated, that doesn't receive recognition. Men also suffer in silence. I know. They are also alone. I know it for a fact. They also break down inside and have to hide it. Undoubtedly. That's true and it deserves to be said.
I remembered my neighbor. She raises two children alone. She works cleaning houses. I've never seen her miss a single day, although I know that there are months when she barely makes it, when the children get sick and she has no one to leave them with, when sometimes she cries on the landing when she thinks no one is watching. And even so, every morning, there she is.
A friend of mine went through a very deep depression after a miscarriage. The kind that keeps you bedridden. But she got up every day. She made breakfast for her children. She took them to school. She smiled at the other mothers at the school gate. She'd get home and sit on the kitchen floor crying for a while, until it was time to pick them up. And the next day, she'd do it all again.
They too have stayed up until two. They too have gotten up at six. They too have been in debt, alone, exhausted. They too have had their hearts broken. And the next day they kept working, trying, believing that everything would turn out alright. What do we call that? Luck? I don't think so.
So I think: why, when we talk about this resilience, do we need to label it with a gender? Why is it so hard for us to simply say that there are people who endure incredibly difficult things and keep going? It seems that to value what others experience, we sometimes feel we have to label it as something exclusive. As if acknowledging the suffering of others takes away from our own.
But that's not the case. Life is hard for almost everyone. Men and women spend sleepless nights. Men and women feel alone, indebted, broken. And men and women, the vast majority, get up the next day and keep going. Not because they are one gender or another. But because there is no other choice. Because there are people who depend on them. Because they believe, or need to believe, that tomorrow can be better.
Sometimes I think the problem is that we talk about these things as if strength were a limited resource. As if it had to be divided up and some had more right to it than others. But it doesn't work like that. Character isn't anyone's birthright. It's not in your DNA. It's built, trained, and tested through hardship. And it's built by millions of people every day, of all ages, all backgrounds, all genders.
The phrase I heard isn't wrong. It describes a reality. But it falls short. Because they live that same reality. We all live it. And perhaps what we need isn't to find out who lives it more or who deserves it more. But simply to recognize that getting up every day and carrying on, despite everything, is the most human thing there is ...
漏 Original content in Spanish, translated into English by Google Translate
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